About 6 months ago I wrote about cagu (in-grown toe nail), I got rid of it with the help of Dr wong. For 6 months I lived a pain free existence, I though cagu has been dealth with forever...I was wrong, cagu came back with a vengence and jab me where it hurts most. I battled it for almost a week before I decided to get Dr Wong for help again.
It came back one morning when I felt an irritating pain at my left big toe. Red and slightly swelling...to my horror..."could this be cagu?" I asked. Then as time passed, I let it fester and there was a slight pus discharged and I was battling it with "betadine". Pus stopped but the irritation was there. Fought it for a week and I though to myself, "this cannot go on, it would ruin my weekly futsal big time if it gets worst". To the good doctor I went.
"Hmmmm, your shoes too tight ah?" the good doctor asked. "Is there any permanent fix to this doctor?". "Hmmm maybe we take the entire toe nail out." he said. Cold shivers went down my spine, "No, just do the partial removal thing OK." I fear the agonizing pain of losing the entire toe nail...no way was I going for it.
"Ok, lie down and I'll get on with it". Jabbed me and took out cagu. Now walking with a bandaged toe. So much relieved. Damn cagu, cost RM80 to pot it!!
Die cagu, die! die!. Capt says Au Revoir.
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Sunday, August 30, 2009
EPL 2009/10
4 weeks have passed for the Barclays Premier League 2009/10 and I'm happy coz Spurs has 4 wins out of 4 game. Yaaayyy. They trashed Liverpool, Hull, West Ham and Birmingham...hoowah. Next they face MU, without the faggoty drama king Ronaldo I'm hoping they lose. At the rate Spurs is playing I'm rooting for them to be in the top 4 this season.
Spurs bring me points for the fantasy football, ka ching ching. Capt says Au Revoir.
I'm Back
The Captain is back once again. July and Aug has been a busy month. Projects stack behind one another. So for the not so long 3 days of holiday the good capt has resolved to put in so time to this blog.
Will try to put in more time to blog lah OK. Just keep looking for updates ya.
Set sail laddies, Capt says Au Revoir.
Will try to put in more time to blog lah OK. Just keep looking for updates ya.
Set sail laddies, Capt says Au Revoir.
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
Jinx is at the corner!
I walked past Nani's room and there was a burst of laughter. "Capt Jack Capt Jack", Nani called. I saw Master Chief "Tut" with her. That figures, 2 siaw siaw "char bor" how not to heboh laughing. Nani ask me if I've heared of this superstition. "Chinese believe that if you borrow a sanitary pad from a friend you need to pay money one ah?" she asked. "Really? That's the first for me." I said. Laughter burst out again.
"Ya ya, in my old office you need to pay 5 cents" she continued. "5 cents for a pad, bugger I would ask you for 1 dollar. What is the significance?" I replied. Shoulders shrugged...I got no rational respond for my question. I brush it off as superstition. Laughter burst out again..."Sorry ah...no 5 cents" Nani said.
Which reminds me there was once in Singapore, I stayed with my colleagues (guys & girls) in a rented place. So when it come to doing your laundry at the washing machine we had to schedule different days for different people. My colleague mentioned his wife told him that he cannot was his cloths with her panties..."Suay" it seems. He seems to believe it. Do panties have some invisible power in them that would jinx you?...that seems to be the case. If this is true then most guys sure "Suay" kow kow...why...oral sex muh. Which guy never done this. So...transfer of "suay" power directly into the mouth...how to undo the "suay"?...mandi bunga? Wah ka ka ka ka.
Superstition is for the irrational weak minded folks. Go to school, get degree...still superstitious. There is no such thing as luck, "suay" taifu etc. It's all in the mind. Here are some superstition I googled:-
- Never praise a newborn baby because it will invite ghost or evil spirits. So if we curse a newborn baby, will angels come?
- A baby with wide thick ears will live prosperously? A baby with big dick?...bonks a lot?
-Never marry someone who is 3 to 6 years yourger or older? Screw this...if Megan Fox is willing I'll marry her.
- If a dog howls continuously at night it means death. True...I'll kill the bloody dog.
- Never point at the moon or yours ears might get chopped off. Shit...if I point at the sun...my finger gets burnt?
- Wearing a moustache is considered bad luck. Does this apply to my Indian guy friends?
Step on a crack and break your mother's back. Capt says Au Revoir.
"Ya ya, in my old office you need to pay 5 cents" she continued. "5 cents for a pad, bugger I would ask you for 1 dollar. What is the significance?" I replied. Shoulders shrugged...I got no rational respond for my question. I brush it off as superstition. Laughter burst out again..."Sorry ah...no 5 cents" Nani said.
Which reminds me there was once in Singapore, I stayed with my colleagues (guys & girls) in a rented place. So when it come to doing your laundry at the washing machine we had to schedule different days for different people. My colleague mentioned his wife told him that he cannot was his cloths with her panties..."Suay" it seems. He seems to believe it. Do panties have some invisible power in them that would jinx you?...that seems to be the case. If this is true then most guys sure "Suay" kow kow...why...oral sex muh. Which guy never done this. So...transfer of "suay" power directly into the mouth...how to undo the "suay"?...mandi bunga? Wah ka ka ka ka.
Superstition is for the irrational weak minded folks. Go to school, get degree...still superstitious. There is no such thing as luck, "suay" taifu etc. It's all in the mind. Here are some superstition I googled:-
- Never praise a newborn baby because it will invite ghost or evil spirits. So if we curse a newborn baby, will angels come?
- A baby with wide thick ears will live prosperously? A baby with big dick?...bonks a lot?
-Never marry someone who is 3 to 6 years yourger or older? Screw this...if Megan Fox is willing I'll marry her.
- If a dog howls continuously at night it means death. True...I'll kill the bloody dog.
- Never point at the moon or yours ears might get chopped off. Shit...if I point at the sun...my finger gets burnt?
- Wearing a moustache is considered bad luck. Does this apply to my Indian guy friends?
Step on a crack and break your mother's back. Capt says Au Revoir.
Thursday, June 25, 2009
1 week old
It was an uneventful Thursday...had two meetings, the first was with IT the second one was with a "kepala concrete" fella. So "concrete" is his kepala that it took ages to get thru to him. Anyway, after the meeting I ventured to the "South Sea"...there lies the Kraken called "Amma". I would normally go there to teased "Tullu" kow kow & I get all charged up for work. But one need to be watchful as the kraken lurks there. I encountered the Kraken Amma last evening, she sooo sayang my fren "Tullu"...gave her "Psyllium Husk" to consume. It's suppose to detox and help relieve constipation. Tullu if you are reading this...you full of toxin ah?
Anyway, I was there talking with Tullu and in came "G-001"...she was walking a lil funny. Wassup!! we asked. "I cannot poo poo lah...1 week oredi" said G-001. FUYOH... 1 week. That is something. "Got see doctor ah" I asked. "Got, Doc gave me Senocot to help" was the reply. Next G-001 was jumping up and down, I think G-001 was thinking gravity might help do the trick...like lah that's going to help you poo. "Eat more fruits like prunes " I said. G-oo1 mentioned that once she had to get her mother to help her when she had constipation as it only came out halfway. "Halfway?? How did your mum help? Did she yanked it out for you?" I asked...ewww...I try not to imagine.
"Whatever you do, don't you fart...1 week of accummulated poo can be a killer...play far far if you wanna fart" I said. Hmmm...it got me thinking...if G-001 were to go to the toilet now will there be a "toommm" (sound of a hard piece of cement hitting water) and wet ceiling (air terpecik la). Moral of the story is drink lotz of H2O, eat plenty of fruits and exercise. Tullu give her some of your Psyllium Husk lah.
What is the sound of silence? Capt says Au Revoir.
Anyway, I was there talking with Tullu and in came "G-001"...she was walking a lil funny. Wassup!! we asked. "I cannot poo poo lah...1 week oredi" said G-001. FUYOH... 1 week. That is something. "Got see doctor ah" I asked. "Got, Doc gave me Senocot to help" was the reply. Next G-001 was jumping up and down, I think G-001 was thinking gravity might help do the trick...like lah that's going to help you poo. "Eat more fruits like prunes " I said. G-oo1 mentioned that once she had to get her mother to help her when she had constipation as it only came out halfway. "Halfway?? How did your mum help? Did she yanked it out for you?" I asked...ewww...I try not to imagine.
"Whatever you do, don't you fart...1 week of accummulated poo can be a killer...play far far if you wanna fart" I said. Hmmm...it got me thinking...if G-001 were to go to the toilet now will there be a "toommm" (sound of a hard piece of cement hitting water) and wet ceiling (air terpecik la). Moral of the story is drink lotz of H2O, eat plenty of fruits and exercise. Tullu give her some of your Psyllium Husk lah.
What is the sound of silence? Capt says Au Revoir.
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Fool of a chinak
23 June 1800Hrs...somewhere in PJ
I was going to get a haircut, pegi my regular place tapi tutup. Since I hate my rambut to be sooo lebat I decided to go to the next shop...indian barber. Reminds me of my school days where I'm a regular to this indian barber in Brickfields. It brought back fond memories when I was a kid...some things shouldn't change. I was motioned to sit and I told the barber potong "petak". I like the "flat-top" haircut, macam the "Streetfighter" character "Guile"...only I'm more handsome lah.
The barber knew I was new in his kedai started small talk with me...more like trying to secure future business from me. "Dulu mana pegi potong rambut?" ask indian barber, "Mana mana pun ada, tak pegi satu tempat saja" I replied. "Lain kali mari sini potong lah" he responded. I simply nodded...don't like the idea of being hassled. But I got to hand it to you he took his time cutting my hair, I like that...and constantly asked me "boleh kah"...waahh customer service...he sure earned himself some brownie points. While he was working on my hair some customers walked in. I noticed an old chinese uncle about 60+ years walked in and sat down waiting for his turn.
I think he wanted to dye his hair black because he was holding this hair dye in his hand which was handed to him by the shop's "taukay barber". I was about finished and couldn't help listening to the conversation he had with "taukay barber". In his typical "chinak" accent he asked "Ini (the dye) bagus ah...siapa jual punya?". "Ada supplier india mari sini bagi supply" said taukay in his thick indian accent. To my horror the chinak replied "Ada baguskah...orang india pandai tipu"...how could you say such things you dumb uncle. I would expect you to be wiser at such an age, furthermore you say such things in an indian barber shop? Suddenly, I felt so embarrassed to be there as a fellow chinaman kin of mine made such an insensitive remark.
Well "taukay" wasn't pleased either, he remarked "Semua orang pun boleh tipu, bukan india saja. Awak kena tipu sebab awak bagi dia tipu...ape". Made sense lah what "taukay" said. The uncle just sat dowm smiling, good thing he shut-up. The dude who cut my hair wasn't too pleased either with that remark. I gave him RM50 and it was taking sooo long to get my change. In this time and age, we can still be insensitive about other races. It's understandable for an old uncle to still harbour some racist mentality...but it's sad...some things should change. I just hope the younger & future generation would be different. I got my change and "cabut"...play futsal.
Don't take too big a bite when eating the punani pie, else it's going to taste like shit. Capt says Au Revoir.
I was going to get a haircut, pegi my regular place tapi tutup. Since I hate my rambut to be sooo lebat I decided to go to the next shop...indian barber. Reminds me of my school days where I'm a regular to this indian barber in Brickfields. It brought back fond memories when I was a kid...some things shouldn't change. I was motioned to sit and I told the barber potong "petak". I like the "flat-top" haircut, macam the "Streetfighter" character "Guile"...only I'm more handsome lah.
The barber knew I was new in his kedai started small talk with me...more like trying to secure future business from me. "Dulu mana pegi potong rambut?" ask indian barber, "Mana mana pun ada, tak pegi satu tempat saja" I replied. "Lain kali mari sini potong lah" he responded. I simply nodded...don't like the idea of being hassled. But I got to hand it to you he took his time cutting my hair, I like that...and constantly asked me "boleh kah"...waahh customer service...he sure earned himself some brownie points. While he was working on my hair some customers walked in. I noticed an old chinese uncle about 60+ years walked in and sat down waiting for his turn.
I think he wanted to dye his hair black because he was holding this hair dye in his hand which was handed to him by the shop's "taukay barber". I was about finished and couldn't help listening to the conversation he had with "taukay barber". In his typical "chinak" accent he asked "Ini (the dye) bagus ah...siapa jual punya?". "Ada supplier india mari sini bagi supply" said taukay in his thick indian accent. To my horror the chinak replied "Ada baguskah...orang india pandai tipu"...how could you say such things you dumb uncle. I would expect you to be wiser at such an age, furthermore you say such things in an indian barber shop? Suddenly, I felt so embarrassed to be there as a fellow chinaman kin of mine made such an insensitive remark.
Well "taukay" wasn't pleased either, he remarked "Semua orang pun boleh tipu, bukan india saja. Awak kena tipu sebab awak bagi dia tipu...ape". Made sense lah what "taukay" said. The uncle just sat dowm smiling, good thing he shut-up. The dude who cut my hair wasn't too pleased either with that remark. I gave him RM50 and it was taking sooo long to get my change. In this time and age, we can still be insensitive about other races. It's understandable for an old uncle to still harbour some racist mentality...but it's sad...some things should change. I just hope the younger & future generation would be different. I got my change and "cabut"...play futsal.
Don't take too big a bite when eating the punani pie, else it's going to taste like shit. Capt says Au Revoir.
Monday, June 22, 2009
Sucker!!!
Funnily Tesco Puchong seems to be the place that is frequently mentioned on my blog. You don't just food there you get ideas to write too...hah. I was there last week, bought fish...suddenly "mengidam nak makan ikan". Got 2 pieces of "ikan tongsan" and to my surprise it was selling for RM1.88...cheap. So I bought another 2 pieces of "ikan senangin" and this totaled to RM5.45. Not bad I thought to myself 4 peices of "ikan" for less than RM10.
Next I made my way to get the "perencah kari asam Brahim's"...yup I wanna eat asam fish curry lah. Next on my list brinjal and tomato. Manage to get both and looked fresh too but...FUYOH the line to weigh your vege is soooo panjang...until "Chisel Stone" (Batu Pahat...la). What to do, "beratur" lor like everyone else. As, I was nearing my turn, I looked down and saw this two innocent eyes looking up at me. It was a kid about 8-9 years old. In his hand was just a bag of beans and he asked me in mandarin if he could queue in front of me...I looked back at the line it was until 'Singapore" now. I motioned him to stand in front of me out of pity...yes I know I was unfair to the rest of the people in the queue. But how could you say "No" to those eyes...kinda remind me of "Puss in Boots from Shrek 2"...you know what I mean.
So came to this little kid's turn to weight his bag of bean, he turn at the other direction and called out to his brother and along with their maid they brought a ton of stuff to weigh. "Punani of Punani" kena "Kantoi". So freaking thick skin and they work with flawless precision. They must have done this before...and I was the "sucker" for that day. I dare not turn and look at the crowd behind me, I was unfair to them and now a sucker, I felt sooo small. Then came my turn, quickly weigh my brinjal and tomato...and got outta there. You win this time kid, the Capt never forgets.
Goldfish makes good shashimi. Capt says Au Revoir.
Next I made my way to get the "perencah kari asam Brahim's"...yup I wanna eat asam fish curry lah. Next on my list brinjal and tomato. Manage to get both and looked fresh too but...FUYOH the line to weigh your vege is soooo panjang...until "Chisel Stone" (Batu Pahat...la). What to do, "beratur" lor like everyone else. As, I was nearing my turn, I looked down and saw this two innocent eyes looking up at me. It was a kid about 8-9 years old. In his hand was just a bag of beans and he asked me in mandarin if he could queue in front of me...I looked back at the line it was until 'Singapore" now. I motioned him to stand in front of me out of pity...yes I know I was unfair to the rest of the people in the queue. But how could you say "No" to those eyes...kinda remind me of "Puss in Boots from Shrek 2"...you know what I mean.
So came to this little kid's turn to weight his bag of bean, he turn at the other direction and called out to his brother and along with their maid they brought a ton of stuff to weigh. "Punani of Punani" kena "Kantoi". So freaking thick skin and they work with flawless precision. They must have done this before...and I was the "sucker" for that day. I dare not turn and look at the crowd behind me, I was unfair to them and now a sucker, I felt sooo small. Then came my turn, quickly weigh my brinjal and tomato...and got outta there. You win this time kid, the Capt never forgets.
Goldfish makes good shashimi. Capt says Au Revoir.
Moan-day
Mon 22 June,
LDP 7+am
Not a very good start for a Monday morning, was stuck (as usual) at LDP. While crawling in the ludicrous jam I heard "Ah Choo"...I turned and saw this dude in a pick up truck beside my car "Ah Choo-ing"...all the noise from the highway and I could hear him sneeze. Hope its a bad case of sinus and not H1N1. As I was trying to inch my way forward this lady in a kancil just selamba eat into my lane...buat dunno. I just let her go not wanting to stress out first thing in the morning. Then Mr "Ah Choo" came along my side...next to my horror...as I looked over to his vehicle I saw he has his thumb cover one of his "lubang hidung" and he blew his nose. Aiiiieee...saw the "hingus" came outta his other "lubang hidung" and I think it landed on the front of or on my car....ewwww. The dude just selamba drove off. So freaking gross...SOB. Just pray its not H1N1, else anyone travelling along LDP-Federal Highway-KL is at risk b'coz Shit!!! I just became a potential super carrier of H1N1.
Office 8+am
Got out of the parking and making my way to the office I realised I forgot to bring my tag...sigh...I need to register myself at the guard counter and surrender my driving license. Turned-on my PC and made my way to the pantry...saw "Makcik" there who was about to have her breakfast. Huh..."Nasi Lemak" sold out (everyday "Jeb" dude would put breakfast for sale at the pantry)...so laku. The "Makcik" turned and asked me if I wanted to share he "roti mentega". I thanked her and declined, suddenly beyond my expectation she said "Oh thank god you didn't take my bread, else I got nothing to eat". I shot back at her "Why did you offer in the first palce if you never wanted to share...so insincere". Makcik with her "tebal muka" said "Oh I ajak-ajak ayam only"...such audacity. Responded to a friend's email by taking the BMI test...24.8 slighly over-weight it says. WTF, I play futsal every week and the computer says I'm slightly over-weight.
Office 9+am
Things began to settle down hope all is well until the day ends. Catch rate on mousehunt was pretty good...is this the silver lining? I hope so, else I would have to "mandi" flower liao.
You can't say "P****", but you can say "PUNANI". Capt says Au Revoir.
LDP 7+am
Not a very good start for a Monday morning, was stuck (as usual) at LDP. While crawling in the ludicrous jam I heard "Ah Choo"...I turned and saw this dude in a pick up truck beside my car "Ah Choo-ing"...all the noise from the highway and I could hear him sneeze. Hope its a bad case of sinus and not H1N1. As I was trying to inch my way forward this lady in a kancil just selamba eat into my lane...buat dunno. I just let her go not wanting to stress out first thing in the morning. Then Mr "Ah Choo" came along my side...next to my horror...as I looked over to his vehicle I saw he has his thumb cover one of his "lubang hidung" and he blew his nose. Aiiiieee...saw the "hingus" came outta his other "lubang hidung" and I think it landed on the front of or on my car....ewwww. The dude just selamba drove off. So freaking gross...SOB. Just pray its not H1N1, else anyone travelling along LDP-Federal Highway-KL is at risk b'coz Shit!!! I just became a potential super carrier of H1N1.
Office 8+am
Got out of the parking and making my way to the office I realised I forgot to bring my tag...sigh...I need to register myself at the guard counter and surrender my driving license. Turned-on my PC and made my way to the pantry...saw "Makcik" there who was about to have her breakfast. Huh..."Nasi Lemak" sold out (everyday "Jeb" dude would put breakfast for sale at the pantry)...so laku. The "Makcik" turned and asked me if I wanted to share he "roti mentega". I thanked her and declined, suddenly beyond my expectation she said "Oh thank god you didn't take my bread, else I got nothing to eat". I shot back at her "Why did you offer in the first palce if you never wanted to share...so insincere". Makcik with her "tebal muka" said "Oh I ajak-ajak ayam only"...such audacity. Responded to a friend's email by taking the BMI test...24.8 slighly over-weight it says. WTF, I play futsal every week and the computer says I'm slightly over-weight.
Office 9+am
Things began to settle down hope all is well until the day ends. Catch rate on mousehunt was pretty good...is this the silver lining? I hope so, else I would have to "mandi" flower liao.
You can't say "P****", but you can say "PUNANI". Capt says Au Revoir.
Friday, June 12, 2009
Ron for Real
Ronaldo the faggoty drama queen is leaving Man Utd for Real Madrid...Yay!! I don't have to see his face next season. Another good thing, my fantasy football competitor would not have him in their team any longer...imagine making him captain and he scores...kow kow points they would get.
Imagine paying 80 million pounds for him...seow I tell you...he ain't worth it. Anyway don't care what he do lah...I won't see him next season.
The 1 eye jack is king in the land of the blind. Capt says Au Revoir.
Imagine paying 80 million pounds for him...seow I tell you...he ain't worth it. Anyway don't care what he do lah...I won't see him next season.
The 1 eye jack is king in the land of the blind. Capt says Au Revoir.
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Love thy neighbour
I would like to think that our country's relationship with Indonesia is close and strong. However, maybe because of this closeness we take each other for granted. We start taking pot shots at one another without any consideration on how this is going to reflect us on the world arena and the impact on our so called close and strong relationship. Within a span of 2 week I can see in the media how poorly behaved we have been.
1st case: Manohara Odelia Pinot.
Indonesian model claimed that she was raped and tortured by husband. Now a medical examination confirms that it was true. Shame shame shame. Rape, torture and abused...have we flushed down civilised mentality down the toilet in Malaysia? Does being in a certain class in society allows you to thump over others?
2nd case: Abused maid.
It was reported yesterday a maid sought protection from the Indonesia embassy as her boss (a single mother) abused her and held her wages of 5 years. Are we treating maids like slaves? Aren't they human with feelings just like us? Just because we pay their wages doesn't mean it gives us the right to beat them and do as we pleased. I've seen many a times how maids are treated, they seem to work round the clock...no rest. Even the smallest of task is also given to the maid. Try switching places for a change...do onto others what you want others to do onto you. Maid abuse...this is not the 1st in Malaysia.
3rd case: Ambalat.
Fighting over oil. We seem to have provoked our neighbours countless times. Just get our borders fixed and agreed upon lah. Let the International Court of Justice decide if we can't. Susah susah patrol into disputed waters and almost got fired upon. Is war what we want?
There is no 2nd chance to 1st impression. Capt says Au Revoir.
1st case: Manohara Odelia Pinot.
Indonesian model claimed that she was raped and tortured by husband. Now a medical examination confirms that it was true. Shame shame shame. Rape, torture and abused...have we flushed down civilised mentality down the toilet in Malaysia? Does being in a certain class in society allows you to thump over others?
2nd case: Abused maid.
It was reported yesterday a maid sought protection from the Indonesia embassy as her boss (a single mother) abused her and held her wages of 5 years. Are we treating maids like slaves? Aren't they human with feelings just like us? Just because we pay their wages doesn't mean it gives us the right to beat them and do as we pleased. I've seen many a times how maids are treated, they seem to work round the clock...no rest. Even the smallest of task is also given to the maid. Try switching places for a change...do onto others what you want others to do onto you. Maid abuse...this is not the 1st in Malaysia.
3rd case: Ambalat.
Fighting over oil. We seem to have provoked our neighbours countless times. Just get our borders fixed and agreed upon lah. Let the International Court of Justice decide if we can't. Susah susah patrol into disputed waters and almost got fired upon. Is war what we want?
There is no 2nd chance to 1st impression. Capt says Au Revoir.
Psyhic...konon
Finally, it is good to be back blogging...thanks to "Hacker". I was out makaning celebrating my mom's birthday last weekend at this seafood restaurant. Ordered 5-6 dishes...so so only la. I not really into chinese cuisine unlike my siblings. So I let them do the ordering while I concentrate on makaning.
So after habis makan, I called for the bill. As they were processing the bill a platter of fruits came...hmm papaya and jelly covered with ice. How nice...dessert compliments from the restaurant...now thats what I call service. My bro macam psyhic mentioned the bill would be above RM100. I was surprise...how you know ah? He mentioned by looking at the dessert platter he knows.
Powderful man...I know people look at tea-leaves to tell ones future but my adik look at fruit platter can tell you agak agak how much it cost. The bill came it was RM124.10. My adik says, if they serve jelly with fruits its above RM100. If no jelly just fruits it's below Rm100. If dessert comes with mangoes then its above Rm180. Cheh...I tot he was psyhic...pegi dah. Rupa rupanya he has been dining at restaurant cina more than me that he was aware of such subtleties. As for me, if you gimme free fruits I eat first lor. Come to think of it, I know this famous seafood place near a certain roundabout in PJ but never serve fruits leh. Twice we makan there and the bill was near RM200...but no fruits leh...bayang pun tak nampak. Maybe famous liao..."lan si" oredi.
Hmm...if they serve durian on the fruit platter...I tell you your pocket burn a big hole liao.
I'll give you my treasure chest if you can show me shit that smells like fresh baked bread. Capt says Au Revoir.
So after habis makan, I called for the bill. As they were processing the bill a platter of fruits came...hmm papaya and jelly covered with ice. How nice...dessert compliments from the restaurant...now thats what I call service. My bro macam psyhic mentioned the bill would be above RM100. I was surprise...how you know ah? He mentioned by looking at the dessert platter he knows.
Powderful man...I know people look at tea-leaves to tell ones future but my adik look at fruit platter can tell you agak agak how much it cost. The bill came it was RM124.10. My adik says, if they serve jelly with fruits its above RM100. If no jelly just fruits it's below Rm100. If dessert comes with mangoes then its above Rm180. Cheh...I tot he was psyhic...pegi dah. Rupa rupanya he has been dining at restaurant cina more than me that he was aware of such subtleties. As for me, if you gimme free fruits I eat first lor. Come to think of it, I know this famous seafood place near a certain roundabout in PJ but never serve fruits leh. Twice we makan there and the bill was near RM200...but no fruits leh...bayang pun tak nampak. Maybe famous liao..."lan si" oredi.
Hmm...if they serve durian on the fruit platter...I tell you your pocket burn a big hole liao.
I'll give you my treasure chest if you can show me shit that smells like fresh baked bread. Capt says Au Revoir.
Thursday, June 4, 2009
4 June, Captain's log...
I'm baaacccck. Accessing this blog via backdoor...caya to "Tom-cat". As of today, he shall be known as "Hacker" for reasons I cannot mention here. Nanti the spy spy bocor rahsia then susah. "Hacker' if you are reading this you know what I mean.
Finally, I feel fine once again having being able to use "muka-buku" and "blogging". Almost went mad, manage to play mousehunt...made it to Master...woohoo. Caught some powderful maus...yeah! Now that I got backdoor, I'll wait for inspirasi to hit me for my next update...till then sit tight.
I like to move it move it...Capt says Au Revoir.
Finally, I feel fine once again having being able to use "muka-buku" and "blogging". Almost went mad, manage to play mousehunt...made it to Master...woohoo. Caught some powderful maus...yeah! Now that I got backdoor, I'll wait for inspirasi to hit me for my next update...till then sit tight.
I like to move it move it...Capt says Au Revoir.
Monday, June 1, 2009
I'll be back...wait ah!
Bummer...my operations has be disrupted by the evil evil IT people. They have since barred "Muka-Buku" and all blogs. My spies mentioned that it was due to some dude who was downloading movies and that how it got a messed up. Phew...for a moment I though I was the culprit. But no fear Tom-cat has found a way...maxis broadband (MBB)...wah ha ha ha...that kid is a genius (how do you think I get to put this on the blog). Kudos to Tom-cat...muakks.
Mua ha ha...I manage to secure a spare notebook and its hooked up with MBB. By this week it will be business as usual. Till then, the pirate will return.
You can knock Capt Jack Pipit off balance, but you can't keep him down. Capt says Au Revoir.
Mua ha ha...I manage to secure a spare notebook and its hooked up with MBB. By this week it will be business as usual. Till then, the pirate will return.
You can knock Capt Jack Pipit off balance, but you can't keep him down. Capt says Au Revoir.
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
Toilet Story
Chilling with Master Chief "Tut" is like watching the discovery channel...something to discover each day. Today, I discover the that some of our ladies at our floor have got appalling toilet habit. What I'm writing here was described to me by the Master Chief. Once she was pee peeing in the toilet, and as she turns to her left...sticking on the cubicle wall was a sanitary pad...awww. What the hell was this person thinking, nak buat statement ke?
This morning as Master Chief was about to go make her investment at the "tandas pompuan" bank, she noticed something perculiar about the cubicle as she swang open the door. Toilet bowl clean, floor clean...but the toilet seat at both sides have stain of...of...eeeww shit...GROSS. Immediately she lost the urge to lepas, now still sangkut inside her.
The culprit: 1) must have ceret beret, 2) did not sit on the toilet seat, 3) must have stained panties and 4) is a freaking mongoloid retard. How did I come to such a conclusion...hah...elementary. Let me explain;
1) Lets go for the easy one first, if she had sat on the toilet seat it would have gone straight down and not hit the side of the toilet seat. My guess is she was standing with her ass hovering about 6 inches above the toilet seat. Squatting on the toilet seat would break it.
2) Ceret beret...b'cos when the ceret beret shit comes outta your ass-hole its like a shot from a shot-gun, it spreads...that explain how the side of the seat is stained. This also support the theory that the culprit was standing. If she didn't ceret beret the shit would be in a straight line and hit the water with a "thuumb" and the sides would be clear...but thats not the case.
3) The floor was dry, so it means she didn't wash. See...for her to wash standing the floor would be wet. Since she was standing in the first place, she wouldn't be sitting to wash. Now that the seat is stained...lagi she won't sit. Therefore, she must have used toilet paper to wipe...eeewww...and you know using toilet paper is never clean one (see my earlier blog on "Cuci ke tak?").
4) Any normal human being would not have done this for the poor cleaner lady to cleanup and for the other toilet users to gross out, therefore...freaking mongoloid retard.
Why is it so difficult to lace the toilet seat with toilet paper and do business? Chances of anyone making a mess is rather remote...don't you think so. If you want to catch the culprit, go find the person with skid marks on the taifu.
Civilised thinking takes 1 light year backwards in the toilet. Capt says Au Revoir.
This morning as Master Chief was about to go make her investment at the "tandas pompuan" bank, she noticed something perculiar about the cubicle as she swang open the door. Toilet bowl clean, floor clean...but the toilet seat at both sides have stain of...of...eeeww shit...GROSS. Immediately she lost the urge to lepas, now still sangkut inside her.
The culprit: 1) must have ceret beret, 2) did not sit on the toilet seat, 3) must have stained panties and 4) is a freaking mongoloid retard. How did I come to such a conclusion...hah...elementary. Let me explain;
1) Lets go for the easy one first, if she had sat on the toilet seat it would have gone straight down and not hit the side of the toilet seat. My guess is she was standing with her ass hovering about 6 inches above the toilet seat. Squatting on the toilet seat would break it.
2) Ceret beret...b'cos when the ceret beret shit comes outta your ass-hole its like a shot from a shot-gun, it spreads...that explain how the side of the seat is stained. This also support the theory that the culprit was standing. If she didn't ceret beret the shit would be in a straight line and hit the water with a "thuumb" and the sides would be clear...but thats not the case.
3) The floor was dry, so it means she didn't wash. See...for her to wash standing the floor would be wet. Since she was standing in the first place, she wouldn't be sitting to wash. Now that the seat is stained...lagi she won't sit. Therefore, she must have used toilet paper to wipe...eeewww...and you know using toilet paper is never clean one (see my earlier blog on "Cuci ke tak?").
4) Any normal human being would not have done this for the poor cleaner lady to cleanup and for the other toilet users to gross out, therefore...freaking mongoloid retard.
Why is it so difficult to lace the toilet seat with toilet paper and do business? Chances of anyone making a mess is rather remote...don't you think so. If you want to catch the culprit, go find the person with skid marks on the taifu.
Civilised thinking takes 1 light year backwards in the toilet. Capt says Au Revoir.
Friday, May 22, 2009
Tikus Freeload 2
We have got a tikus infestation in the office, I'm not talking about the 4 legged small furry kind but the 2 legged ball-less kind. This is a sequal to my earlier post, 1st officer Zee would always have two container of junkfood on her table. Lately her generousity seems to have been taken advantage of again. After the muruku incident, we had a calm time...no tikus...suddenly the tikus tikus re-appeared...and I got a name for you.
1st officer Zee brought this "Rempeyek" to share with us. Kinda generous of her as it came all the way from Kedah, send to her by her beloved "buffalo". Instead of makan sendiri, she shared with us...1 big container...filled to the brim. 2 days passed no sign of the tikus, I suppose when the tikus saw a tiger guarding the "Rempeyek" they all back away...waiting for the right time to hijack. At the end of day 2 I was looking for something to chew and made my way to the container. Missing!....it was missing...how can this be? Not far away I saw a group of tikus happily enjoying the "Rempeyek". Shit! muka tembok, tengah meeting and you hijack orang punya "Rempeyek". What can I say...container not mine...I balik my place and pack up.
Next morning, I came face to face with an angry tiger. Container is...EMPTY!!! and tikus tikus sekalian didn't own up. Tikus tikus yang tak ber-balls hijack her "Rempeyek". All the way from Kedah and kena hijack. How can people so inconsiderate...makan habis at least inform lah people or buy somethng back in exchange...pandai pandai jaga hati lah. Simple courtesy pun tak erti..."bowl real"! (mangkuk betul).
So officially I'm naming the tikus tikus as follows "cibai maus" for the betina and "ball-less maus" for the jantan. They should be included in mouse-hunt, and to attract them used "muruku cheese" or "rempeyek cheese".
To calm an angry hungry tiger you give it food, but how do you calm an angry "itchy" tiger??? Capt says Au Revoir.
1st officer Zee brought this "Rempeyek" to share with us. Kinda generous of her as it came all the way from Kedah, send to her by her beloved "buffalo". Instead of makan sendiri, she shared with us...1 big container...filled to the brim. 2 days passed no sign of the tikus, I suppose when the tikus saw a tiger guarding the "Rempeyek" they all back away...waiting for the right time to hijack. At the end of day 2 I was looking for something to chew and made my way to the container. Missing!....it was missing...how can this be? Not far away I saw a group of tikus happily enjoying the "Rempeyek". Shit! muka tembok, tengah meeting and you hijack orang punya "Rempeyek". What can I say...container not mine...I balik my place and pack up.
Next morning, I came face to face with an angry tiger. Container is...EMPTY!!! and tikus tikus sekalian didn't own up. Tikus tikus yang tak ber-balls hijack her "Rempeyek". All the way from Kedah and kena hijack. How can people so inconsiderate...makan habis at least inform lah people or buy somethng back in exchange...pandai pandai jaga hati lah. Simple courtesy pun tak erti..."bowl real"! (mangkuk betul).
So officially I'm naming the tikus tikus as follows "cibai maus" for the betina and "ball-less maus" for the jantan. They should be included in mouse-hunt, and to attract them used "muruku cheese" or "rempeyek cheese".
To calm an angry hungry tiger you give it food, but how do you calm an angry "itchy" tiger??? Capt says Au Revoir.
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
What's in the name?
Your "Name" I feel is precious and important to your image...it is your name that would carry you or sink you. Thats why I always make it a point trying to remember a person's name and to make sure I pronounce it right. Getting this correct shows respect...if you ask me.
I can't help but to think that there are some people out there who do not realised the significance or trivalize the significance of their own name or when naming a child. For example "Do Do Cheng"...I don't think its cool to name yourself after an extinct bird...but it seems to be the case for some Hongkies. "DoDo" can be interpreted as stupid...Dodo is a stupid bird...thats why they are extinct. I've never heard of the name "Hacken" until this one HK pop star rose to stardom. Why "Hacken"...cos his chinese name is Lee Hak Kan...kinda silly ain't it...repeating your name. I'm not saying you don't have the right to choose your own name, but I'm suggesting choose wisely.
It is very popular among the chinese that their carries a certain auspicious meaning. I met this dude from mainland China and introduced himself as "Mansion"...yup you know "Mansion" as in the big house. Having the name "Mansion" in you chinese name may sounds ok but as an English name...kelakar lah! "Mansion" went on to introduce his friend to me, "Pussy" is her name, not shitting you here...I dare not ask if she likes cats. I shall say no more. Why can't people stick with more traditional english names? Boring is a reason I can think off,... rather be boring and safe if you ask me.
Choosing a name would mean you have to live with it for the rest of your life, be careful when choosing a name for your kid. You can imagine the ridicule from his/her peers...kids are cruel. I read on a newspaper that this physics teacher called his kids..."proton, neutron & electron". Imagine, Capt Proton Pipit...eeew...just shoot me. Stick to the conventional names lah...sigh.
Finally make sure you know how to spell your chosen name lah. I was at this cake shop and there was this parent bukan main lansi...after they had chosen the cake I overheard the mother saying to the shop assistant in a condescending tone in cantonese "Happy Birthday to Carmen Michael" (translated). "How to spell ah?" ask the shop assistant. To my horror both the parent's couldn't spell "Carmen Michael"...they went like "K-A-R-M-U-N " to "K-A-R-M-A-N". Nak name glamour but tak tau spell...sigh...another reason for sticking to conventional names. I left the shop not wanting to know the outcome.
Gravity release me, never ever hold me down...and my feet won't touch the ground. Capt says Au Revoir.
I can't help but to think that there are some people out there who do not realised the significance or trivalize the significance of their own name or when naming a child. For example "Do Do Cheng"...I don't think its cool to name yourself after an extinct bird...but it seems to be the case for some Hongkies. "DoDo" can be interpreted as stupid...Dodo is a stupid bird...thats why they are extinct. I've never heard of the name "Hacken" until this one HK pop star rose to stardom. Why "Hacken"...cos his chinese name is Lee Hak Kan...kinda silly ain't it...repeating your name. I'm not saying you don't have the right to choose your own name, but I'm suggesting choose wisely.
It is very popular among the chinese that their carries a certain auspicious meaning. I met this dude from mainland China and introduced himself as "Mansion"...yup you know "Mansion" as in the big house. Having the name "Mansion" in you chinese name may sounds ok but as an English name...kelakar lah! "Mansion" went on to introduce his friend to me, "Pussy" is her name, not shitting you here...I dare not ask if she likes cats. I shall say no more. Why can't people stick with more traditional english names? Boring is a reason I can think off,... rather be boring and safe if you ask me.
Choosing a name would mean you have to live with it for the rest of your life, be careful when choosing a name for your kid. You can imagine the ridicule from his/her peers...kids are cruel. I read on a newspaper that this physics teacher called his kids..."proton, neutron & electron". Imagine, Capt Proton Pipit...eeew...just shoot me. Stick to the conventional names lah...sigh.
Finally make sure you know how to spell your chosen name lah. I was at this cake shop and there was this parent bukan main lansi...after they had chosen the cake I overheard the mother saying to the shop assistant in a condescending tone in cantonese "Happy Birthday to Carmen Michael" (translated). "How to spell ah?" ask the shop assistant. To my horror both the parent's couldn't spell "Carmen Michael"...they went like "K-A-R-M-U-N " to "K-A-R-M-A-N". Nak name glamour but tak tau spell...sigh...another reason for sticking to conventional names. I left the shop not wanting to know the outcome.
Gravity release me, never ever hold me down...and my feet won't touch the ground. Capt says Au Revoir.
Friday, May 15, 2009
El Chupacabra
I was watching "Monster Quest" at Astro channel 555 last night. It was about "Chupacabra" or the goat sucker from the Central America (see picture).
It's a creature that sucks blood from farm animal, farmers would find their chicken, goats or cows dead minus the blood. More like a vampire in the animal kingdom.
Interestingly incidents were first reported in Puerto Rico then moved over to Central America then latest was in Texas, US of A. They even had photos of it, more like a dog with 4 huge 
fangs...not shitting you here, farmers actually shot 3 of them (see picture below).
fangs...not shitting you here, farmers actually shot 3 of them (see picture below).However, the eyewitness from Central America claimed that it was not dog like rather it walked on 2 feet. So there is a contradiction here...or we have different species of "Chupacabra" running about.
In my office also got a "Chupacabra"...good thing not in my section. Instead of blood this creature sucks the life essence from you. In the end you will be so tense working, suffer from stress and totally "hilang semangat". The office "Chupacabras" cannot be identified at first glance, you need to work with them for you to be able to see their true colours. By then it might just be too late. I wonder if we have "Chupacabra" in our jungle? If we do...guys becareful when you go camping, do you be bonking in the night. Like sharks "Chupacabra" are drawn to blood, it might just give you head and suck you dry and dead. You definately won't die smiling.
"Chupacabra" cannot swim....rite? Damn...man the 12 inch guns. Capt says Au Revoir.
Got spare change Mite?
I was having lunch over at Central Market, as I was admiring the various stuff they got there... my lunch kaki "Smithey" had to go draw some cash from the ATM. A few moment later she came running back saying there is this weirdo at the ATM. Smithey mentioned that this dude had told her he lost his wallet and needed some cash and asked if she could spare him some. All he had with him was a phone-card and he offered to sell it to her. Well I guess he spooked her good...she was outta there so fast even before Superman had time to put on his red taifu.
Smithey was a little guilty for making such a hasty exit. She related the story and asked me what if that dude was genuine. I told not to loose sleep about it as I felt that dude wasn't genuine. Think about it, if you had lost your wallet would you be hanging out at the ATM and offering to trade a phone-card for cash. Cliche if you ask me.
This does not mean I would not assist when there is a cry for help. I suppose I would look at the situation and hear what their story is. Chance are if a person is genuine you can see it from their facial expression and the storyline they tell you flows. A con man tends to cook up story as you probe...the flow isn't there.
I didn't shoot the sheriff. Capt says Au Revoir.
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Ronaldo le Drama King
I was watching the football last sunday, Man Utd vs Man City...dang Man Utd won 2-0. They are getting closer to retaining the title. Man City couldn't even offer any resistance...killjoy. The reason I watched the game was that I was hoping that the the score would be in City's favour.
The highlight of the game was the ever famous faggotty "Cristiano Ronaldo". Faggotty boy threw a fit a the boss man after he was substituted early in the 2nd half. Bloody drama king with an oversize ego. I checked the Sun UK and found out he kena kutuk left right center for his outburst...ha ha ha padan muka. Check out that 20 cent sulking face.
Rumour has it Real Madric is willing to cough up a huge chunk of dough for the faggotty boy...take him I say, can't stand the sight of him. We don't need prima donna's in EPL. Hope Man Utd loses...khaakk ptooi.
Take me to where street lights glow. Capt says Au Revoir.
Monday, May 11, 2009
Family XL
The Star 11 May:
"Grik couple have 21 children"
I was reading this article on the couple with 21 kids, the first thing that came to mind was "How did you manage"? The wife was a home-maker and the husband was working in a saw-mill, they mentioned it was tough and tiring. They had to survive on "beras ayam" or broken rice and wore hand-me down clothes. One can only imagine what it was like growing up in that family. How long would a tin of "Milo" last?
For the average family in Malaysia, having 2 kids is already a challenge. You need to provide not only food, clothing, education also health plan insurance...the works. My question to the couple above was "Why go through all those hardship to have 21 kids"? Have you not heard of family planing? Tak syok ke... pakai condom? "Coitus interruptus" would have given you better odds.
Its none of my business to dictate your family size...but as for myself I would not want to put my family through such a situation of difficulty and be deprived of so many things. Others may beg to differ but I would like to live within my means. This is food for thought for you people out there..."Bonk safe I say".
Barracuda makes good sashimi! Capt says Au Revoir.
"Grik couple have 21 children"
I was reading this article on the couple with 21 kids, the first thing that came to mind was "How did you manage"? The wife was a home-maker and the husband was working in a saw-mill, they mentioned it was tough and tiring. They had to survive on "beras ayam" or broken rice and wore hand-me down clothes. One can only imagine what it was like growing up in that family. How long would a tin of "Milo" last?
For the average family in Malaysia, having 2 kids is already a challenge. You need to provide not only food, clothing, education also health plan insurance...the works. My question to the couple above was "Why go through all those hardship to have 21 kids"? Have you not heard of family planing? Tak syok ke... pakai condom? "Coitus interruptus" would have given you better odds.
Its none of my business to dictate your family size...but as for myself I would not want to put my family through such a situation of difficulty and be deprived of so many things. Others may beg to differ but I would like to live within my means. This is food for thought for you people out there..."Bonk safe I say".
Barracuda makes good sashimi! Capt says Au Revoir.
Friday, May 8, 2009
Goosebumps
1350 Hrs May 8, Capt's log:
Yay...today cuti, replacement leave for wesak day woohoo. Those of you who got to work...wahahaha nyah nyah nyah...dun jealous. Did nothing much except to catch up with some sleep, got 2 hours more today. Was too lazy to lepak outside so I decided to watch the idiot-box.
"Backyard science", astro channel 552 caught my attention. It showed mainly on experiments kids could try at home. Really cool, "ang moh" kids get to play with vineger, baking soda and making a mess in the kitchen in the name of science experiment...and the get away with it. If it was a kid in the average malaysian home...sure kena "kow kow" either from the parents or maid for making a mess. Is this the reason why we are lagging behind "ang mohs" in terms of science and technology?
Well there was this experiment I saw that was interesting..."Goosebumps". They were researching what causes goosebumps...and concluded it was fear, cold and tickling sensation that contribute to it. There 3 elements would cause the muscle at the base of the hair folicle to contract and...voila...goosebumps. "Fear, cold and tickling" huh...what if some horny couple decided to buat project out in the open one night, the fear of getting caught, the chill of the night air and tickling sensation...would all this lead to goosebumps? Would the "rambut pubika" all stand? Imagine someone with hairy butt...suddenly you find hair sticking out from the butt crack...ha ha ha ha...eeeew.
Why Goosebumps? Capt says Au Revoir.
Yay...today cuti, replacement leave for wesak day woohoo. Those of you who got to work...wahahaha nyah nyah nyah...dun jealous. Did nothing much except to catch up with some sleep, got 2 hours more today. Was too lazy to lepak outside so I decided to watch the idiot-box.
"Backyard science", astro channel 552 caught my attention. It showed mainly on experiments kids could try at home. Really cool, "ang moh" kids get to play with vineger, baking soda and making a mess in the kitchen in the name of science experiment...and the get away with it. If it was a kid in the average malaysian home...sure kena "kow kow" either from the parents or maid for making a mess. Is this the reason why we are lagging behind "ang mohs" in terms of science and technology?
Well there was this experiment I saw that was interesting..."Goosebumps". They were researching what causes goosebumps...and concluded it was fear, cold and tickling sensation that contribute to it. There 3 elements would cause the muscle at the base of the hair folicle to contract and...voila...goosebumps. "Fear, cold and tickling" huh...what if some horny couple decided to buat project out in the open one night, the fear of getting caught, the chill of the night air and tickling sensation...would all this lead to goosebumps? Would the "rambut pubika" all stand? Imagine someone with hairy butt...suddenly you find hair sticking out from the butt crack...ha ha ha ha...eeeew.
Why Goosebumps? Capt says Au Revoir.
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
Cruelly Cold
Cold, cruel, heartless, animals...the list can go on...but calling them names would not change a thing. I'm talking about snatch thieves...look at report from the Star 6 May.
["Pregnant woman dies after thieves pull her off motorcycle"
JOHOR BARU: The killers on motorcycles have done it again — this time, snatch thieves took two lives when they tried to rob pregnant Jamilah Selamat. Jamilah, 31, suffered severe head injuries after falling from her motorcycle on Sunday. She died at the Sultanah Aminah Hospital at 7.30am yesterday without regaining consciousness.]
This isn't the only incident, there are others too...
[In 2004, a Nanyang Siang Pau clerk, Chong Fee Cheng, 37, died after she lapsed into a coma following a snatch theft in Taman Molek, Johor Bahru.
In December last year, snatch theft victim Lim See Nya, 58, was run over by a three-tonne truck when she lost her balance and fell onto the road, after a motorcycle pillion rider grabbed her handbag in Bukit Mertajam.]
What has this world come to? Lives taken away without any feeling of remorse. It pisses me big time...thieves get away with it. I'm tired...tired of worrying for my family & friends...why do we need to live in fear? What are the cops doing? At times I wish I could be "Capt Jack Almighty"...snatch thieves...you would be on the top tier on my list of people that would cook in hell...next would be rotten corrupted politicians of course. Alas, sigh...this is just wishful thinking...we need to pray for the safety of our love ones, pray that God would deal with this heartless brutes swiftly, pray that the work of the enemy fails...
Repent now or become fuel for hell. Capt says Au Revoir.
["Pregnant woman dies after thieves pull her off motorcycle"
JOHOR BARU: The killers on motorcycles have done it again — this time, snatch thieves took two lives when they tried to rob pregnant Jamilah Selamat. Jamilah, 31, suffered severe head injuries after falling from her motorcycle on Sunday. She died at the Sultanah Aminah Hospital at 7.30am yesterday without regaining consciousness.]
This isn't the only incident, there are others too...
[In 2004, a Nanyang Siang Pau clerk, Chong Fee Cheng, 37, died after she lapsed into a coma following a snatch theft in Taman Molek, Johor Bahru.
In December last year, snatch theft victim Lim See Nya, 58, was run over by a three-tonne truck when she lost her balance and fell onto the road, after a motorcycle pillion rider grabbed her handbag in Bukit Mertajam.]
What has this world come to? Lives taken away without any feeling of remorse. It pisses me big time...thieves get away with it. I'm tired...tired of worrying for my family & friends...why do we need to live in fear? What are the cops doing? At times I wish I could be "Capt Jack Almighty"...snatch thieves...you would be on the top tier on my list of people that would cook in hell...next would be rotten corrupted politicians of course. Alas, sigh...this is just wishful thinking...we need to pray for the safety of our love ones, pray that God would deal with this heartless brutes swiftly, pray that the work of the enemy fails...
Repent now or become fuel for hell. Capt says Au Revoir.
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
Way of the Pipit
5 May, 1230Hrs lunch-time:
I was on the way of to lunch with ensign "Tom-Cat", master chief "Tut" & boss of master chief, heading towards KFC. On the way outta the basement my radar picked up 11 high 2 bogies. Heading straight in my path, long range scan picked up 2 "chickerdee". So I switch to my kung-fu mode, "see but not see" kung-fu...cuci mata. Not bad looking lah the 2 "chickerdee"...especially the eurasian one. Pakai ketat ketat...hot looking.
Suddenly out of the blue, "Hey you checking out the 2 girls right"...alamak...got caught red handed by master chief "Tut". My mind was racing to find some plausible excuse to deny..but she came back with another jab "Dun pretend lah, my former colleagues were guys too...sure see one". Bummer, my kung-fu didn't work this time round...got beaten by another kung-fu exponent. Master chief "Tut" 1 Capt 0.
On hindsight, I should have let them walk ahead of me...then can cuci mata and not get caught. Kena kantoi today. Must develop new kung-fu style...I must.
Must develop a new kung-fu style..."Way of the Pipit", Capt says Au Revoir.
I was on the way of to lunch with ensign "Tom-Cat", master chief "Tut" & boss of master chief, heading towards KFC. On the way outta the basement my radar picked up 11 high 2 bogies. Heading straight in my path, long range scan picked up 2 "chickerdee". So I switch to my kung-fu mode, "see but not see" kung-fu...cuci mata. Not bad looking lah the 2 "chickerdee"...especially the eurasian one. Pakai ketat ketat...hot looking.
Suddenly out of the blue, "Hey you checking out the 2 girls right"...alamak...got caught red handed by master chief "Tut". My mind was racing to find some plausible excuse to deny..but she came back with another jab "Dun pretend lah, my former colleagues were guys too...sure see one". Bummer, my kung-fu didn't work this time round...got beaten by another kung-fu exponent. Master chief "Tut" 1 Capt 0.
On hindsight, I should have let them walk ahead of me...then can cuci mata and not get caught. Kena kantoi today. Must develop new kung-fu style...I must.
Must develop a new kung-fu style..."Way of the Pipit", Capt says Au Revoir.
Curi Makan
Read this...kelakar betul..."The Star, 5 May"
" A SECRETARY accidentally bit off the penis of her employer while giving him oral sex in a car. Sin Chew Daily and China Press reported yesterday that while the 30-year-old woman was performing oral sex on the man, the car was hit by a reversing van. The impact of the crash, China Press reported, caused the woman to bite off her lover’s organ. The daily reported that the incident occurred in a Singapore park where the couple met after work.
To make matters worse for the woman, her husband had sent a private investigator to spy on her after suspecting that she was being unfaithful. The investigator said he had followed the woman and her boss to the park. “On reaching the park, they did not alight from the car. Not long after, the car started to shake violently.
After the car was hit by the van, there was a loud scream from the woman whose mouth was covered with blood,” he said. The woman later followed her lover to the hospital with part of the sexual organ. The investigator, who called an ambulance to send the man to hospital, said that this was the first time he had encountered such an incident. "
The moral of the story is...guys, when you are getting head do not startle your wife/girlfriend...she might accidentally bite it off...OUCH! I think its' poetic justice...think you could get away with bonking somebody's wife huh...horny Singaporean maggot.
I can imagine how difficult it was for them to explain to the doctor on how it happened...tougher still explaining to their spouse on their infidelity. Siapa suruh curi makan?
Its' not getting what you want that matters...its' wanting what you got. Capt says Au Revoir.
" A SECRETARY accidentally bit off the penis of her employer while giving him oral sex in a car. Sin Chew Daily and China Press reported yesterday that while the 30-year-old woman was performing oral sex on the man, the car was hit by a reversing van. The impact of the crash, China Press reported, caused the woman to bite off her lover’s organ. The daily reported that the incident occurred in a Singapore park where the couple met after work.
To make matters worse for the woman, her husband had sent a private investigator to spy on her after suspecting that she was being unfaithful. The investigator said he had followed the woman and her boss to the park. “On reaching the park, they did not alight from the car. Not long after, the car started to shake violently.
After the car was hit by the van, there was a loud scream from the woman whose mouth was covered with blood,” he said. The woman later followed her lover to the hospital with part of the sexual organ. The investigator, who called an ambulance to send the man to hospital, said that this was the first time he had encountered such an incident. "
The moral of the story is...guys, when you are getting head do not startle your wife/girlfriend...she might accidentally bite it off...OUCH! I think its' poetic justice...think you could get away with bonking somebody's wife huh...horny Singaporean maggot.
I can imagine how difficult it was for them to explain to the doctor on how it happened...tougher still explaining to their spouse on their infidelity. Siapa suruh curi makan?
Its' not getting what you want that matters...its' wanting what you got. Capt says Au Revoir.
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Anything good out there?
Disaster struck today...the mousehunt application in facebook has a bug. Spoil my plans only, I wanted to go to the mausoleum to catch those changgih manggih maus. Sigh...dunno how long it would take them to fix. Arsenal lost to MU (champions league) didn't help make my day any better either. I'm not as optimistic as the rest of my colleagues...they think that Arsenal would bounce back during the second leg and kick MU on the ass.
Then there was this disturbing news, police arrested man for murdering his own daughter and burried her body in a field 3 years ago. News has it that she was abused physically and sexually. What animal would do such a thing? And there is "selsema babi" pandemic, WHO raised alert level to level 5... better don't eat babi for the moment! Is there anything good? Turn to the newspaper, and all we see is sorrow, bad news, robbery etc...whats wrong with this picture here?
In light of all the negative events happening, is there a message to be conveyed? Is this the sign of the end of times as written in the book of Revelations? Where does man go to for refuge, for comfort, for peace? Does man rely on his wisdom and strength to overcome this? To whom does man turn to...will he turn to God? Will you?
Repent, repent...before its too late, Capt says Au Revoir.
Then there was this disturbing news, police arrested man for murdering his own daughter and burried her body in a field 3 years ago. News has it that she was abused physically and sexually. What animal would do such a thing? And there is "selsema babi" pandemic, WHO raised alert level to level 5... better don't eat babi for the moment! Is there anything good? Turn to the newspaper, and all we see is sorrow, bad news, robbery etc...whats wrong with this picture here?
In light of all the negative events happening, is there a message to be conveyed? Is this the sign of the end of times as written in the book of Revelations? Where does man go to for refuge, for comfort, for peace? Does man rely on his wisdom and strength to overcome this? To whom does man turn to...will he turn to God? Will you?
Repent, repent...before its too late, Capt says Au Revoir.
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Upgrade Blog "Look & Feel"
The Capt has updated the "look & feel"...cantik or not? The link to "Life in Technicolour 2" by Coldplay has been removed. In future there will be more upgrade to the "look & feel"...tengok mood lah. Till then...
Shoot down those Thunderbirds...watch out for their poop, Capt says Au Revoir.
Shoot down those Thunderbirds...watch out for their poop, Capt says Au Revoir.
Monday, April 27, 2009
Ang Moh...cetak rompak
1230pm lunch time, 27 Apr 09:
I was with me ship mates, 1st officer "Zee", Master Chief "Tut" and Ensign "Tom Cat" out for lunch. We decided to walk thru central market as Zee and Tut wanted to get out of the sun, they might just melt in the blazing heat. I don't mind as a matter of fact I kinda like walking thru central market...can cuci mata...lotz of ang moh.
From a distance just before the side exit near the 2nd hand book shop I saw 2 ang mohs. Set course 12 o'clock...intercept mode. From far far they look like pretty young thing...must get nearer to take a good look I must. I conviniently let me ship mates passed them first so that they would not catch me gawking at ang moh...he he he...no need to be so obvious muh.
There is something strange about the blond that I was approaching, something is not right. Aiyah!!!...it's a cina wannabe ang moh. I took a good look at her...speaking speaking in ang moh accent (if I'm visually challenged, I would thinks she is an ang moh), hair dye blond colour, small asian boobs, squinty chinese looking eyes (like Lucy Liu) with Michael Jackson skin tone. Gosh!!!... lady what have you done to your skin, took an acid bath or something ah? It was so pale looking this oriental Michael Jackson.
Pale skin, small boobs and squinty eyes...it's an ang moh cetak rompak. What was the motivation to want to look like an ang moh. She would have looked prettier as an asian. Hey lady, you got issues with your esteem or you are those who worship ang moh? Beh tahan...go "chiak peng" better lah.
Set sail to Tora Bora sil vouz plait, Capt says Au Revoir.
I was with me ship mates, 1st officer "Zee", Master Chief "Tut" and Ensign "Tom Cat" out for lunch. We decided to walk thru central market as Zee and Tut wanted to get out of the sun, they might just melt in the blazing heat. I don't mind as a matter of fact I kinda like walking thru central market...can cuci mata...lotz of ang moh.
From a distance just before the side exit near the 2nd hand book shop I saw 2 ang mohs. Set course 12 o'clock...intercept mode. From far far they look like pretty young thing...must get nearer to take a good look I must. I conviniently let me ship mates passed them first so that they would not catch me gawking at ang moh...he he he...no need to be so obvious muh.
There is something strange about the blond that I was approaching, something is not right. Aiyah!!!...it's a cina wannabe ang moh. I took a good look at her...speaking speaking in ang moh accent (if I'm visually challenged, I would thinks she is an ang moh), hair dye blond colour, small asian boobs, squinty chinese looking eyes (like Lucy Liu) with Michael Jackson skin tone. Gosh!!!... lady what have you done to your skin, took an acid bath or something ah? It was so pale looking this oriental Michael Jackson.
Pale skin, small boobs and squinty eyes...it's an ang moh cetak rompak. What was the motivation to want to look like an ang moh. She would have looked prettier as an asian. Hey lady, you got issues with your esteem or you are those who worship ang moh? Beh tahan...go "chiak peng" better lah.
Set sail to Tora Bora sil vouz plait, Capt says Au Revoir.
Thursday, April 23, 2009
Colour...Hitam
I was at IOI Puchong for lunch yesterday after doing some errants. They have got a new wing, modern looking as oppose to the old wing. Ventured into the new wing and decided to lunch at Sakea Sushi. Kinda impressive as they had a computer terminal for you to place your order...you get to see the enlarge photo of the food you are interested in prior to your order. Cool...high tech. Food there is reasonable, Salmon sushi is RM1.90/plate...cheap.
As I finished placing my order, this couple got my attention as they were walking in. They sat down at the table diagonally opposite me...my 1 o'clock. This dude was with his lady friend/wife I dunno. 20 cents face looking with a spaghetti strap dress. I can see she is wearing a pink bra as her "kuay teow" (bra strap) was showing. No big deal, not a looker at all...but there was something about her I dun like...just can't put a finger to it yet...maybe it's her looks, maybe it's her mannerism. Occasionally I would look over to peek at her.
Alamak...kangkang...she duduk kangkang...aiyoh not enough O2 downstairs is it? I was using my "see but not see" kung fu on her...for obvious reasons lah. I can't help but feel she did it deliberately...playing peek a boo with me. I pretend dunno. Then this waiter served her and her balak a plate of sashimi...and I heard her asking the waiter in distinctly clear chinak accent "You all don't wear mask one ah?". The poor waiter shook his head and walk away after serving her. She tunjuk her muka semacam and wolf down the fish...and kangkang at my direction.
How many restaurants in KL do you know have got their waiters wearing mask? Was she doing this just to intimidate this poor waiter? Was she suffering from chronic inferior complex, she has to make someone feel small? I was in Japan and the sushi chef used his hands without glove to make the sushi...so whats the big idea here. Nak tunjuk class go lah to some expensive place and close your legs lah. All the time when she kangkang I did not see the taifu, but then she angled herself at me...it was black...eeew. At that moment I was sipping my miso soup and almost threw up, I thought I saw part of her taifu in my soup...turns out to be sea-weed...phew yum yum. Beh tahan...she got up and left before me. 20 cent face chinak. Should I mandi bunga??? For what it's worth it was a sick feeling...as though you saw your best friend's mom kangkang before you. Pukey puke.
Facebook says I'm like Capt Jean Luc Picard...woohoo, Capt says Au Revoir.
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Kutu Sampah
What is to become of Puchong? First there was Khakk Ptooi who leaves DNA on the road and now we have kutu sampah. If nothing is done to eradicate these creatures, Puchong will look like dump site. As I was travelling home last evening along LDP near Puchong Putri, I saw this Kancil in front of me. It has a little sign stuck on its rear windshield which says "If you think this car is cute, wait till you see the driver"...corny if you ask me. Since I was stuck in the balik rumah jam, I tried to see her reflection from her rear view mirror. Can't quite make out her face but I know its a girl.
About 5 minutes into the jam, I noticed a hand coming out of the drivers window...hmm what this girl up to...and suddenly I saw in her hand was a plastic wrapper. Conviniently she dumps it on the road as if the wrapper would bio-degrade the instant it hit the road. C*** B** littering after you stuff your face I said to myself, tak civic conscious at all. Failed pendidikan moral in school is it?...BITCH.
As the traffic was moving along I tried to overtake her car to see how she look like...cute ke tak? She so happens swerve to the left and I accelerated to get a good look at her. Early 20 sumthing girl... muka macam porn star...patut lah. I counted my blessings, if she was shagging in the car...heaven forbid that she throws the condom outta the window...rubbish and DNA along LDP...eeew a dreadful thought.
Set course to Isla Nublar, Capt says Au Revoir.
About 5 minutes into the jam, I noticed a hand coming out of the drivers window...hmm what this girl up to...and suddenly I saw in her hand was a plastic wrapper. Conviniently she dumps it on the road as if the wrapper would bio-degrade the instant it hit the road. C*** B** littering after you stuff your face I said to myself, tak civic conscious at all. Failed pendidikan moral in school is it?...BITCH.
As the traffic was moving along I tried to overtake her car to see how she look like...cute ke tak? She so happens swerve to the left and I accelerated to get a good look at her. Early 20 sumthing girl... muka macam porn star...patut lah. I counted my blessings, if she was shagging in the car...heaven forbid that she throws the condom outta the window...rubbish and DNA along LDP...eeew a dreadful thought.
Set course to Isla Nublar, Capt says Au Revoir.
Monday, April 20, 2009
Man Utd...Ta-pau
Mua ha ha ha ha Man Utd made my day by losing to Everton in the FA Cup semifinal. There goes their quintuple dream...woohoo...serve you right for being "lan si". Now I'm hoping that Liverpool would take the Premier League title (fingers cross coz MU is firing all cylinders to bag this) and Arsenal to take the Champions League.
The faggoty drama king...C.Ronaldo can go look for another club to play coz MU is not getting anymore silverware, Giggs and Scholes can retire lah...uncles. Just keep Tevez and Berba upfront as they are the misfiring strikers...keep it up.
Spurs beat the Toons 1-0...yay...they play MU next week, hopefully they spring a surprise on them and kick the shit outta them...revenge for the Carling Cup. Dafoe would be back for Spurs, watch out MU...get ready to "ta-pau".
1 "Ping" only Varsailly, Capt says Au Revoir.
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Tikus Freeload
Food when its free will definately attract freeloaders,...disgusting creatures they are. They just eat your food and don't bother to replenish it. There are creatures like this in the office. At times you wish you could lace the food with cyanide...but that would mean blood on your hands.
I normally get my junkfood supply from my first officer "Zee". Zee would have a tub of junkfood on her table and anyone who wish to eat would just take from the tub. The food was mean for people within our pirate community eg ensign "TomCat", master chief "Hyper-Tuty" & Capt Jack. As we dun kira so much boundries are not drawn too, this resulted in tikus-tikus from other sections to makan the food. We dun mind, but I've an unwritten rule...you makan people's food you replenish oso lah.
This week's delicacy was muruku, FUYOH...popular. When I pegi to my 1st officer's place to get my morning fix...it was missing. The entire tub of muruku was missing. "Mana muruku" I queried. With mata juling 1st officer say kena hijack tikus. You see this tikus got meeting tapi bawak our loot pegi meeting...WTF? Want to makan we dun mind, but hijack our food especially when its muruku...you got lotz of nerve you tikus. Muka tebal...tak tau malu punya freeloader. Now it is after lunch, meeting over liao...still no sign of the tub of muruku. I tot of bringing a chain and chain the tub to the desk...hope tikus get the message. However, must consider this option very carefully though, the tikus tikus can be very sensitive one. Nanti the East Pirate Trading Company kena boycott.
This is what I think of you tikus tikus...naaaaahhhh!
Sial...sape pangsai tak flush!!!! Kerja tikus ke ni?
Watch for floating turds, Capt say Au Revoir.
I normally get my junkfood supply from my first officer "Zee". Zee would have a tub of junkfood on her table and anyone who wish to eat would just take from the tub. The food was mean for people within our pirate community eg ensign "TomCat", master chief "Hyper-Tuty" & Capt Jack. As we dun kira so much boundries are not drawn too, this resulted in tikus-tikus from other sections to makan the food. We dun mind, but I've an unwritten rule...you makan people's food you replenish oso lah.
This week's delicacy was muruku, FUYOH...popular. When I pegi to my 1st officer's place to get my morning fix...it was missing. The entire tub of muruku was missing. "Mana muruku" I queried. With mata juling 1st officer say kena hijack tikus. You see this tikus got meeting tapi bawak our loot pegi meeting...WTF? Want to makan we dun mind, but hijack our food especially when its muruku...you got lotz of nerve you tikus. Muka tebal...tak tau malu punya freeloader. Now it is after lunch, meeting over liao...still no sign of the tub of muruku. I tot of bringing a chain and chain the tub to the desk...hope tikus get the message. However, must consider this option very carefully though, the tikus tikus can be very sensitive one. Nanti the East Pirate Trading Company kena boycott.
This is what I think of you tikus tikus...naaaaahhhh!
Sial...sape pangsai tak flush!!!! Kerja tikus ke ni? Watch for floating turds, Capt say Au Revoir.
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Bird in hand
Office Gents, level 17: 1015am
A quick description of the gents, has 4 taps, 4 urinals and 4 cubicles with hose. I was about to was my hands when this dude came in and occupy the first urinal. Hmm...pakai tie serious looking dude...dun care lah...wash my hand. As I was pulling the paper towels to dry my hands, I notice this dude (from urinal no#1) was walking backwards to the tap basin. Curious why was he walking backwards, I selamba wipe my face and took a peek...ic he got a "bird in hand" and was about to give it a bath. Alamak!, if want to wash do it lah at the urinal (I've seen people doin that...got water muh) or do it in the privacy of the cubilce since it has a hose. Aiyoh, washing little birdie at the basin...gross...look at the floor... its wet.
I wonder, if there was more than just me in the gents would this dude still be holding little birdie with the backward manouver and wash it at the basin? Would he have minded having others watch him bath birdie? Well...I wouldn't want to see lah...pretend make dunno is what I would do. I got no issues with washing the birdie, just don't make a mess of the gents lah. Many of us are just kuli in the organisation, we don't have the priviledge of a private toilet like the CEO. So keep the gents clean lah.
He he he...some stuff you see happening at the gents. "A bird in hand, needs washing and is not worth two in the bush"...that is when its in the gents of coz.
Capt Ahab has gone mad, Capt say Au Revoir.
A quick description of the gents, has 4 taps, 4 urinals and 4 cubicles with hose. I was about to was my hands when this dude came in and occupy the first urinal. Hmm...pakai tie serious looking dude...dun care lah...wash my hand. As I was pulling the paper towels to dry my hands, I notice this dude (from urinal no#1) was walking backwards to the tap basin. Curious why was he walking backwards, I selamba wipe my face and took a peek...ic he got a "bird in hand" and was about to give it a bath. Alamak!, if want to wash do it lah at the urinal (I've seen people doin that...got water muh) or do it in the privacy of the cubilce since it has a hose. Aiyoh, washing little birdie at the basin...gross...look at the floor... its wet.
I wonder, if there was more than just me in the gents would this dude still be holding little birdie with the backward manouver and wash it at the basin? Would he have minded having others watch him bath birdie? Well...I wouldn't want to see lah...pretend make dunno is what I would do. I got no issues with washing the birdie, just don't make a mess of the gents lah. Many of us are just kuli in the organisation, we don't have the priviledge of a private toilet like the CEO. So keep the gents clean lah.
He he he...some stuff you see happening at the gents. "A bird in hand, needs washing and is not worth two in the bush"...that is when its in the gents of coz.
Capt Ahab has gone mad, Capt say Au Revoir.
Flat Water
I have heard of musical notes in flat eg b-flat, c-flat etc (can't tell the diff, I'm some1 who is a musical idiot), flat chested (this I know), stay in flat...but flat water!...hmm...this is new. I was in the pantry this morning and I saw this new colleague of mine filling up her water tumbler and I noticed she was slicing lemon into her tumbler.
"Lemon in your H2O!?" I say, "ah yes...I dun want it to taste flat" came the reply..."want some?" she continued? I declined and went about my business. Pondering ponder...hmm...how does someone... say... at the mamak order ice-kosong but dun want it flat? Ice-kosong campur limau?...bet you get "limau ice" instead. Or ice-kosong tapi tak mau rata...that would stop mamak dude at his tracks. Bet mamak dude would be cracking his head figuring out what concoction you wanted...hmm. Had this experience with a friend at this indian restaurant, he ordered anchor ice. What was delivered was anchor beer with a glass of ice...hilarious. So I really want to see what mamak dude would bring when someone ordered "not flat ice water"...come to think of it how does one order that in the first place?
So if I don't want my water to be flat I add slices of lemon, if I want my water to be voluptuous add what ah?...sunkist?
There is a wild wind blowing..., Capt say Au Revoir.
"Lemon in your H2O!?" I say, "ah yes...I dun want it to taste flat" came the reply..."want some?" she continued? I declined and went about my business. Pondering ponder...hmm...how does someone... say... at the mamak order ice-kosong but dun want it flat? Ice-kosong campur limau?...bet you get "limau ice" instead. Or ice-kosong tapi tak mau rata...that would stop mamak dude at his tracks. Bet mamak dude would be cracking his head figuring out what concoction you wanted...hmm. Had this experience with a friend at this indian restaurant, he ordered anchor ice. What was delivered was anchor beer with a glass of ice...hilarious. So I really want to see what mamak dude would bring when someone ordered "not flat ice water"...come to think of it how does one order that in the first place?
So if I don't want my water to be flat I add slices of lemon, if I want my water to be voluptuous add what ah?...sunkist?
There is a wild wind blowing..., Capt say Au Revoir.
Monday, April 13, 2009
Life in Technicolor
In my earlier post "TV rocks", I mentioned I forgot the title of the Coldplay song...well its "Life in Technicolor 2" (just click on the play button, and listen ...sorry link removed 29 Apr 09 ). I manage to catch that music video twice on my off-day on Friday, really cool I must say. If I were to ask the question, what color would you describe your life to be? What would you say?
As for me, if I were to assign colors to the people I meet, to my experience and my mood each day...then I would say its a spectrum of colors. Bright colors would be assigned to those who made my day, blue...that my color...it's also the color for "Les Bleus", black for the "CBKs", poison people I meet and the Blackpearl of coz. What is most important I suppose is the perspective we take...that will determine the colors in your life.
You may have a black spot painted on your canvas of life today, but take a step back I'm sure you will notice there are a wide array of other colors (unless you some sorry major league loser). Do not focus on just one color, look back in retrospect and enjoy the spectrum.
Till then, I'll continue smoking pot...
Damn Somali pirates...spoil market, Capt says Au Revoir.
As for me, if I were to assign colors to the people I meet, to my experience and my mood each day...then I would say its a spectrum of colors. Bright colors would be assigned to those who made my day, blue...that my color...it's also the color for "Les Bleus", black for the "CBKs", poison people I meet and the Blackpearl of coz. What is most important I suppose is the perspective we take...that will determine the colors in your life.
You may have a black spot painted on your canvas of life today, but take a step back I'm sure you will notice there are a wide array of other colors (unless you some sorry major league loser). Do not focus on just one color, look back in retrospect and enjoy the spectrum.
Till then, I'll continue smoking pot...
Damn Somali pirates...spoil market, Capt says Au Revoir.
Yay...Spurs
Spurs 1 West Ham 0...yay Spurs. Last year when the 08/09 season began, it was disastrous for Spurs. They were at the bottom of the table for ages. Even with top imports it never did anything to boost them out of the bottomless pit. In came Redknapp in October the new boss-man and tides changed. Now Spurs are in the top 10 of the table, and the season is ending soon...yay. If they play with the continuous fighting spirit they may even qualify for the Europa League...fingers cross.
What Spurs need right now are sure fire strikers, hopefully Dafoe recovers before the season ends. I bet he and Keane would be potent up front. They are doin fine in the midfields with Modric, Lennon, Jenas and Palacios. Defence need to be worked on King has injury issues, can't partner Woodgate now can he? Think Spurs need to build up this area by next season.
Goalkeeper...kudos to Gomes...once known as the butter-finger has now bloomed to one good goalie. His weakness is still in set-pieces. His confidence has returned but need to work on set-piece, most of the goals against Spurs come from set-piece. In short, Viva Spurs Allez Spurs.
Queequeg does the Hakka, Capt says Au Revoir.
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Easter Sunday
OK, so we have Good Friday…what’s next…Easter Sunday of course. On Easter Sunday, Christians celebrate the resurrection of the Lord, Jesus Christ. It is typically the most well-attended Sunday service of the year for Christian churches.
Christians believe according to Scripture, that Jesus came back to life, or was raised from the dead, three days after his death on the cross. As part of the Easter season, the death of Jesus Christ by crucifixion is commemorated on Good Friday, always the Friday just before Easter. Through his death, burial and resurrection, Jesus paid the penalty for sin, thus purchasing for all who believe in him, eternal life in Christ Jesus.
The fact that Jesus was resurrected from the dead, and that His resurrection demonstrates that we can indeed be promised an eternal home in Heaven by receiving Jesus as our Savior…Christ's resurrection is something that should be celebrated every day, not just once a year.
The tomb is empty, He has risen..., Capt says Au Revoir.
Christians believe according to Scripture, that Jesus came back to life, or was raised from the dead, three days after his death on the cross. As part of the Easter season, the death of Jesus Christ by crucifixion is commemorated on Good Friday, always the Friday just before Easter. Through his death, burial and resurrection, Jesus paid the penalty for sin, thus purchasing for all who believe in him, eternal life in Christ Jesus.
The fact that Jesus was resurrected from the dead, and that His resurrection demonstrates that we can indeed be promised an eternal home in Heaven by receiving Jesus as our Savior…Christ's resurrection is something that should be celebrated every day, not just once a year.
The tomb is empty, He has risen..., Capt says Au Revoir.
Good Friday
Good Friday is the Friday immediately preceding Easter Sunday. It is traditionally the day on which Jesus was crucified. Why is Good Friday referred to as “good”? What the Jewish authorities and Romans did to Jesus was definitely not good. However, the results of Christ’s death are very good! The big question now is why did Jesus had to die? I suppose by answering this question, I hope the reader would then understand the fundamental of the Christian faith and the meaning behind Good Friday. Here goes;
Sin entered the world through one man's disobedience - Adam, and now all of us are born into this "sinful nature". God being all merciful, powerful and forgiving is also holy, righteous and just. Because of sin, we are separated from God. God's holiness and justice demand that sin and rebellion be punished. The only penalty or payment for sin is eternal death. Our death is not sufficient to atone for sin because atonement requires a perfect, spotless sacrifice, offered in just the right way. Jesus, the one perfect God-man, came to offer the pure, complete and everlasting sacrifice to remove, atone, and make eternal payment for our sin. Only through Jesus Christ can our sins be forgiven, thus restoring our relationship with God and removing the separation caused by sin. Our faith, looking backward to his act of salvation, saves us. When we accept Jesus' payment for our sin, his perfect sacrifice washes away our sin and restores our right standing with God. God's mercy and grace provided a way for our salvation.
In summary, when we are "in Christ Jesus" we are covered by his blood through his sacrificial death, our sins are paid for, and we no longer have to die an eternal death. We receive eternal life though Jesus Christ. And this is why Jesus had to die.
Many Christian churches celebrate Good Friday with a subdued service, usually in the evening, when Christ’s death is remembered with solemn hymns, prayers of thanksgiving, a message centered on the Messiah’s suffering for our sakes. Good Friday…the events of that day should be ever on our minds because the death of Christ on the cross is the paramount event of the Christian faith.
The blood that was shed on the cross, was for you and me, Capt says Au Revoir.
Sin entered the world through one man's disobedience - Adam, and now all of us are born into this "sinful nature". God being all merciful, powerful and forgiving is also holy, righteous and just. Because of sin, we are separated from God. God's holiness and justice demand that sin and rebellion be punished. The only penalty or payment for sin is eternal death. Our death is not sufficient to atone for sin because atonement requires a perfect, spotless sacrifice, offered in just the right way. Jesus, the one perfect God-man, came to offer the pure, complete and everlasting sacrifice to remove, atone, and make eternal payment for our sin. Only through Jesus Christ can our sins be forgiven, thus restoring our relationship with God and removing the separation caused by sin. Our faith, looking backward to his act of salvation, saves us. When we accept Jesus' payment for our sin, his perfect sacrifice washes away our sin and restores our right standing with God. God's mercy and grace provided a way for our salvation.
In summary, when we are "in Christ Jesus" we are covered by his blood through his sacrificial death, our sins are paid for, and we no longer have to die an eternal death. We receive eternal life though Jesus Christ. And this is why Jesus had to die.
Many Christian churches celebrate Good Friday with a subdued service, usually in the evening, when Christ’s death is remembered with solemn hymns, prayers of thanksgiving, a message centered on the Messiah’s suffering for our sakes. Good Friday…the events of that day should be ever on our minds because the death of Christ on the cross is the paramount event of the Christian faith.
The blood that was shed on the cross, was for you and me, Capt says Au Revoir.
Monday, April 6, 2009
TV rocks!
I love nothing more than to sit in front of the idiot box vegetating...ahhhh bliss. Turned to channel 711 AXN...woohoo...Coldplay live in UK. They played "Viva La Vida"...awesome. I love Coldplay. Later watched channel 551 Discovery channel...Man vs Wild...Fuyoh...this dude drink his own pee to stay alive. Would any of you drink your own pee from RM1million? Was flipping thru the channels and came across 521 from Down Under...was watching this cool music video...Coldplay again...woohoo...but forgot the title of the song...fan of Coldplay konon.
Later that night Wigan was behind Eveton by 2 goals...goodbye Wigan, flip to channel 122 Astro Awani. Cool title..."Gerak Kilat" by Jins Shamsuddin who plays the malaysian version of James Bond...Jeffri Zain. Wah ha ha ha hilarious, it has all the elements of a B-movie, bad script, poor acting and kayu actors/actresses. I remember one scene, the heroine was trapped in a room filling up with water with Jeffri. So took off her bra (they don't do this anymore in movies these days...good old days) and lo and behold, concealed in her bra was a little gun with 2 bullets. "Ada 2 peluru, kau bunuh saja saya, kemudian kau boleh bunuh diri mu"...wah ha ha ha hilarious acting. For all its worth, I kinda enjoyed it. Next was "Simon Says"...aaawww...stoopid movie...switched to football again, Eveton 4 Wigan 0. Next channel MU 3 Aston Villa 2...noooo...freaking 2 last minute goals. Depress depress, bloody MU got away. Pegi tidur, sudah lewat...zzzzzz in la la land.
I love foreplay, play-play and coldplay, Capt says Au Revoir.
Later that night Wigan was behind Eveton by 2 goals...goodbye Wigan, flip to channel 122 Astro Awani. Cool title..."Gerak Kilat" by Jins Shamsuddin who plays the malaysian version of James Bond...Jeffri Zain. Wah ha ha ha hilarious, it has all the elements of a B-movie, bad script, poor acting and kayu actors/actresses. I remember one scene, the heroine was trapped in a room filling up with water with Jeffri. So took off her bra (they don't do this anymore in movies these days...good old days) and lo and behold, concealed in her bra was a little gun with 2 bullets. "Ada 2 peluru, kau bunuh saja saya, kemudian kau boleh bunuh diri mu"...wah ha ha ha hilarious acting. For all its worth, I kinda enjoyed it. Next was "Simon Says"...aaawww...stoopid movie...switched to football again, Eveton 4 Wigan 0. Next channel MU 3 Aston Villa 2...noooo...freaking 2 last minute goals. Depress depress, bloody MU got away. Pegi tidur, sudah lewat...zzzzzz in la la land.
I love foreplay, play-play and coldplay, Capt says Au Revoir.
Hard-selling Trolls
Went jalan jalan at Sunway Pyramid last evening, parked the car and got out from the escalator facing Harvey Norman. Nothing much to see and decided to walked towards J.Co doughnuts. That stretch was quite crowded, and as I walk along it I cannot but have this nagging feeling I'm being watched...the force serves me well. True enough, coming my way at full steam at my 1 o'clock this dude with forms in his hand stood in my way. "Excuse me sir, do you have a credit card...you wanna try my credit card, free for life, got rebate when you pump petrol yadda yadda yadda etc". With an icy stare right into his eyes, "NO"...and I guess he must have read my mind "Outta my way...I'm walking here"...back-off he did.
A little further down another troll pops up, this time its a she-troll...tak cun pun. "NO" I said the moment I saw her coming my way, shot down before you could even say "Excuse me". But if she was cun, depan ada belakang ada bukan macam papan, I would have stopped and listened for a while...she would have had me at "Excuse me"...ha ha ha. Sigh... another approached me as I was approaching J.Co...it bites the dust too.
What does it take to enjoy your jalan jalan at the shopping mall these days? Fed-up with all the hardsell from these trolls. Free for life my a**, b'cos after year 1 they charge you annual fee and when you call to complaint they say policy change...but they can waive it for you since you used it more than 12 times. Right...how come you never told me this before. I'm happy with my current credit card, so don't bother me will ya you trolls!!
Shoo don't bother me! Gi main jauh jauh.
Load torpedo tubes 1 & 2, Capt says Au Revoir.
A little further down another troll pops up, this time its a she-troll...tak cun pun. "NO" I said the moment I saw her coming my way, shot down before you could even say "Excuse me". But if she was cun, depan ada belakang ada bukan macam papan, I would have stopped and listened for a while...she would have had me at "Excuse me"...ha ha ha. Sigh... another approached me as I was approaching J.Co...it bites the dust too.
What does it take to enjoy your jalan jalan at the shopping mall these days? Fed-up with all the hardsell from these trolls. Free for life my a**, b'cos after year 1 they charge you annual fee and when you call to complaint they say policy change...but they can waive it for you since you used it more than 12 times. Right...how come you never told me this before. I'm happy with my current credit card, so don't bother me will ya you trolls!!
Shoo don't bother me! Gi main jauh jauh.
Load torpedo tubes 1 & 2, Capt says Au Revoir.
Monday Biru
How your day begins is kinda important as it can influence how the rest of your day turns out. My mood was ruined Saturday night itself, Spurs lost 2-1 to freaking Blackburn...2 last minute goals. Then came Monday morning Villa lost to freaking MU 3-2...again to 2 last minute goals. Shit...that really got the shit ball rolling...good morning shitty monday. The only consolation from EPL this week is "moi" is "numero uno" in the fantasy league...mua ha ha ha.
Alarm rang at 6am, shut it and balik tidur only to wake up half an hour later...oooo shit. Quick mandi, no time to "pang sai" got outta the house...jam at Sunway toll. Cleared the toll 30 minutes later and came face to face with a white Mercedes, hello C** B** this is a 2 lane road if you din notice, what the shit are you trying to do creating a third lane. So freaking close to my car, was playing chicken with him every single step...until conventional wisdom took precedence, let the prick win...if kena accident lagi susah. As I stop to let the prick move into my lane, another prick shows up from behind and makan into my lane...ok pass...I'm in no mood to argue with you in the morning...my ego take the back seat. Pricks 2 Capt 0.
Came to the office had my breakfast and hot coffee, ahhhh soothing...I though the worst is gone. Out from the corner I see a shadow, familiar shadow...its...its the silhouette of the 48 year old virgin...eeeewww poisonous fella...lets call her auntie for short. Auntie has issues with my crew, accusing them of saying that she is mental...which my crew never did. Auntie must be psyhic, can hear people talk when nobody did. Hmmm...did she hear people's thoughts or hear voices from somewhere else. So now she merajuking dun want to liase with any of them...so I had to be a messenger. She came over to my place and say "here return this document to you", yes true...the document belongs to my section...but speak with my crew lah as they are the custodian. As I called auntie and ask her to hand it over to the document custodian, she buat tak dengar tak tau...terus jalan. So I called her twice, bikin tak dengar...there is no way tak dengar...cos auntie was just 2 feets away. How rude!!!
This raises an interesting point, if some tua auntie whose both "front and back door" hasn't been used before (virgin...muhhh) would they hear voices??? The truth is out there. I know when people while using the front door... got some other noise they hear...he he he.
I love mouse hunt, Capt says Au Revoir.
Alarm rang at 6am, shut it and balik tidur only to wake up half an hour later...oooo shit. Quick mandi, no time to "pang sai" got outta the house...jam at Sunway toll. Cleared the toll 30 minutes later and came face to face with a white Mercedes, hello C** B** this is a 2 lane road if you din notice, what the shit are you trying to do creating a third lane. So freaking close to my car, was playing chicken with him every single step...until conventional wisdom took precedence, let the prick win...if kena accident lagi susah. As I stop to let the prick move into my lane, another prick shows up from behind and makan into my lane...ok pass...I'm in no mood to argue with you in the morning...my ego take the back seat. Pricks 2 Capt 0.
Came to the office had my breakfast and hot coffee, ahhhh soothing...I though the worst is gone. Out from the corner I see a shadow, familiar shadow...its...its the silhouette of the 48 year old virgin...eeeewww poisonous fella...lets call her auntie for short. Auntie has issues with my crew, accusing them of saying that she is mental...which my crew never did. Auntie must be psyhic, can hear people talk when nobody did. Hmmm...did she hear people's thoughts or hear voices from somewhere else. So now she merajuking dun want to liase with any of them...so I had to be a messenger. She came over to my place and say "here return this document to you", yes true...the document belongs to my section...but speak with my crew lah as they are the custodian. As I called auntie and ask her to hand it over to the document custodian, she buat tak dengar tak tau...terus jalan. So I called her twice, bikin tak dengar...there is no way tak dengar...cos auntie was just 2 feets away. How rude!!!
This raises an interesting point, if some tua auntie whose both "front and back door" hasn't been used before (virgin...muhhh) would they hear voices??? The truth is out there. I know when people while using the front door... got some other noise they hear...he he he.
I love mouse hunt, Capt says Au Revoir.
Thursday, April 2, 2009
FARKS
I was at Tesco Puchong the other day...buying my weekly groceries. If you observe the people around you doing their groceries, you can tell if they are single, students, married or married with family just by kaypoh-ing looking into their trolley. I usually make a list of about 10+ items to buy but everytime when I finished its like 20+ items in the trolley. Funnily most of the stuff I purchased would only be used once or twice and I tend to forget about it until it expires. This happens all the time everytime. One thing about me is that whatever stuff I purchased it will be opened at home, that me I suppose. No matter how tempting it is to open it there at Tesco, I will make it a point to wait. I've seen some people just grab a packet of chips open it and go on a munching spree as they continue shopping. I don't have issues with such fellas as long as they pay for it at the counter...kinda weird if you ask me. Imagine handing over your can of half drunk coke to the cashier for her to scan the price, chances are she would ponder for a moment and hand the can back to you. If she bags it...there goes your coke, paid in full but half drunk. Wait till I get home and buka is still my policy.
What really irks me is this category of people...fat and revolting kiasu shit..."FARKS" in short. I met one the other day when I was at the fresh fruits aisle and there it was a FARKS... this was slightly different... she was on a wheelchair. There she was picking up a bunch of grapes... picking the good ones into her plactic bag and the rest she doesn't want she just threw it back. To my disgust she pops a few into her mouth and continue with her grape selection. C'mon there are other consumers in the store, I'm certain they dun want a to buy a bunch of grapes that already ruins b'cos FARKS like her FARKS-handled them, what more bunch of grapes without the grapes. I just stared with disgust at her but dia buat tak tau tak kisah. Just b'cos you are physically challenged that doesn't give you the right to be so freaking selfish.
That was my worst FARKS encountered to date, I noticed they all got this thing in common...they are fat and ugly and...grapes appeal to them. All my encounter with this creature were at the aisle where they place the grapes. I bet Tesco is aware of this parasitic creatures, just that they are at loss how to get rid of them. Maybe they should have FARKS of the day contest. See when a FARKS is caught, balloons would fall from the ceiling, someone walks up to them and put a "FARKS of the day" sach around them and they get to take a photo with the store manager. Hmmm...something to ponder...FARKS are so thick skin dunno if they would feel embarrassed?
FARKS make good Kraken bait, Capt says Au Revoir.
Les Bleus wins!!!
Group 7 World Cup Qualifier
France 1 Lithuania 0....YAY wooohoo. Caya lah, France made my day, finally I've seen some progress from a lackluster start. I felt France would be able to do better...no thanks to Raymond Domenech...CBK of a coach. His ass is safe for now. If I were him I would bring in the young blood into the team after getting knocked out from the 2006 world cup, by now the team would be one that is molded and synergised. Unlike now, this CBK is still experimenting. France has a good chance of qualifying to the 2010 world cup but not sure about them performing well like in 1998. Sack Raymond Domenech, gimme Laurent Blanc or Jean Tigana. France need a potent striker now, Henry is aging, Anelka not consistent, Benzema yet to show what he is made of...as such goals are coming from the midfields...can't be depending on the midfields right?
I'm rooting for France good or bad.
Viva France Allez Les Bleus, Capt says Au Revoir.
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
Terror Merral
Ahhh finally, manage to get into the blog...had problems with the connection over the last couple of days...thats why no updates lor. The Capt is baaacckk...anyone missed me?
Have you come across people who likes to berlagak, tunjuk terror...in the process hoping they impress you or intimidate you? I met lotz of such creatures. Why can't they just lead a normal life instead of trying too hard impress or stroke their ego to an orgasm. Here are some interesting encounter I had with those creatures.
1. Berlagak trying to show you "drink salt water" i.e overseas educated lah. Speaking speaking in Mat Salleh slang. Big deal speaking speaking...what does it prove? The one that take the cake are those "sekolah cina mari", can't speak proper engrish dun lagak speaking speaking lor. Talk like a regular malaysian won't kill you one leh. They most of the time add "s" to every word that spews from their mouth. Example; "lets go's eats" or "whats is yours names". I would go around saying something like "All your bases are belonging to us" to spite these creatures, so far none got what it meant yet...he he he.
2. Wine drinking is becoming very popular now, and there are some losers who would jump into the wine drinking band-wagon lor...nak tunjuk ada class konon. I once invited a group of people I know over for lunch, had spaghetti and some of us brought wine. There was this pompuan who tunjuk terror... minum wine pun tak erti, nak bagi komen..."This wine so so only...you should buy 1945". I was like waiting for her to complete her sentence, but she stopped at 1945...period. Harlo!!! C*** B** 1945 is the year, what good is it if your quote the year??? If you want to do it right, say lah something like "Chateau le Bordeux 1945". By naming the brand and year, people who knows something about wine would know the type of wine, region, country and year...and if its a reknown wine you are quoting, people would concur with you. Dun lah just quote 1945, you can fool others but not me...am not impressed at all! Fake...wannabe...ptooi!! Btw "Chateau le Bordeux 1945" does not exist, I was just making a point here. Please dun go to "Denise Wine Shop" and say a bottle of "Chateau le Bordeux 1945" please...nanti kena "Tiaw".
3. I like listening to mp3 while working, it helps me think...but once there was this dude asked if I listen to classical music. My reply was not really...wah this "tu lan" fella say I'm not cultured, dunno how to appreciate classical music. Oooo...not cultured huh u say, I went on to ask who was his favourite composer? He said "Mozart"...ooo a slight tinge of culture I detect in this fella. Ok which piece I asked? His response was I dunno the title but went to to hum the tune of that piece to me...I asked again, which piece? He condesendingly say this song lah and continue humming. If he had said "Mozart 12 symphony in C minor", I would salute him...ada culture. The only culture he got is the bacteria culture festing near his asshole cos he din wash...TNS...what audacity to call me uncultured.
4. I beh tahan people who cannot pronounce orang punya name correctly e.g, Philip is not Philips, P-lip or Fee-lip ok. I'm very particular one, as getting someone's name correct is an indicator that shows how much respect you have towards others. Once I was at this karaoke, this dude was hogging the mike...I want to sing this song "I love Chopin by Gazebo" he says and happily singing out of tune...but what scores big time was the name "Chopin". "Chopin" is pronounce "Show-Pun" not "Chopping". That evening this C*** B** was serenading us about his love for "Choppping"...aiyoh shoot me lah. Cannot sing already bad enough, to top it up... cannot pronounce people's name somemore...KNN.
Watch the portside, left full rudder, Capt says Au Revoir.
Have you come across people who likes to berlagak, tunjuk terror...in the process hoping they impress you or intimidate you? I met lotz of such creatures. Why can't they just lead a normal life instead of trying too hard impress or stroke their ego to an orgasm. Here are some interesting encounter I had with those creatures.
1. Berlagak trying to show you "drink salt water" i.e overseas educated lah. Speaking speaking in Mat Salleh slang. Big deal speaking speaking...what does it prove? The one that take the cake are those "sekolah cina mari", can't speak proper engrish dun lagak speaking speaking lor. Talk like a regular malaysian won't kill you one leh. They most of the time add "s" to every word that spews from their mouth. Example; "lets go's eats" or "whats is yours names". I would go around saying something like "All your bases are belonging to us" to spite these creatures, so far none got what it meant yet...he he he.
2. Wine drinking is becoming very popular now, and there are some losers who would jump into the wine drinking band-wagon lor...nak tunjuk ada class konon. I once invited a group of people I know over for lunch, had spaghetti and some of us brought wine. There was this pompuan who tunjuk terror... minum wine pun tak erti, nak bagi komen..."This wine so so only...you should buy 1945". I was like waiting for her to complete her sentence, but she stopped at 1945...period. Harlo!!! C*** B** 1945 is the year, what good is it if your quote the year??? If you want to do it right, say lah something like "Chateau le Bordeux 1945". By naming the brand and year, people who knows something about wine would know the type of wine, region, country and year...and if its a reknown wine you are quoting, people would concur with you. Dun lah just quote 1945, you can fool others but not me...am not impressed at all! Fake...wannabe...ptooi!! Btw "Chateau le Bordeux 1945" does not exist, I was just making a point here. Please dun go to "Denise Wine Shop" and say a bottle of "Chateau le Bordeux 1945" please...nanti kena "Tiaw".
3. I like listening to mp3 while working, it helps me think...but once there was this dude asked if I listen to classical music. My reply was not really...wah this "tu lan" fella say I'm not cultured, dunno how to appreciate classical music. Oooo...not cultured huh u say, I went on to ask who was his favourite composer? He said "Mozart"...ooo a slight tinge of culture I detect in this fella. Ok which piece I asked? His response was I dunno the title but went to to hum the tune of that piece to me...I asked again, which piece? He condesendingly say this song lah and continue humming. If he had said "Mozart 12 symphony in C minor", I would salute him...ada culture. The only culture he got is the bacteria culture festing near his asshole cos he din wash...TNS...what audacity to call me uncultured.
4. I beh tahan people who cannot pronounce orang punya name correctly e.g, Philip is not Philips, P-lip or Fee-lip ok. I'm very particular one, as getting someone's name correct is an indicator that shows how much respect you have towards others. Once I was at this karaoke, this dude was hogging the mike...I want to sing this song "I love Chopin by Gazebo" he says and happily singing out of tune...but what scores big time was the name "Chopin". "Chopin" is pronounce "Show-Pun" not "Chopping". That evening this C*** B** was serenading us about his love for "Choppping"...aiyoh shoot me lah. Cannot sing already bad enough, to top it up... cannot pronounce people's name somemore...KNN.
Watch the portside, left full rudder, Capt says Au Revoir.
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Bearish Market
23 Mar 09, lunch time...
"Ding" the elevator door opened, me and my first officer "Zee" walked in. Hello...lookee here, "Adeline" is with us in the elevator...chatting away with her friends. In my previous blog "Koyak", I mentioned that she was kinda OK looking from afar...just that her butt moves from left to right. So , I kaypoh a bit lah...eeeew...her voice sounds like a tikus squeeking away...and there are LRT tracks on her teeth (braces).
"Crash" stock market... crash big time. Quick Zee let get out of here, I don't want to loose my appetite for lunch. After taking a closer look, tak cun lah. But I let "Adeline" go out first lor...at least can still watch her butt go left right left right.
16 men on a dead man's chest..., Capt says Au Revoir.
"Ding" the elevator door opened, me and my first officer "Zee" walked in. Hello...lookee here, "Adeline" is with us in the elevator...chatting away with her friends. In my previous blog "Koyak", I mentioned that she was kinda OK looking from afar...just that her butt moves from left to right. So , I kaypoh a bit lah...eeeew...her voice sounds like a tikus squeeking away...and there are LRT tracks on her teeth (braces).
"Crash" stock market... crash big time. Quick Zee let get out of here, I don't want to loose my appetite for lunch. After taking a closer look, tak cun lah. But I let "Adeline" go out first lor...at least can still watch her butt go left right left right.
16 men on a dead man's chest..., Capt says Au Revoir.
Monday, March 23, 2009
"Tinkerbell"... is that you??
21 Mar 09, Stadium Putra Bukit Jalil 1630HRS;
I was at Bukit Jalil catching "Disney on Ice-Princess Wishes", was there at 1550HRS...an ocean of kids I saw. Made my way to the entrance got...met this dude selling pop-corn, thought to myself why not. Took a box and found out it was RM10...bummer...not worth it, should have asked for price first before buying. Then got myself a bottle of coke...double bummer RM3. This is daylight robbery man, paid RM13 for pop-corn and coke...its three times the price I pay at TGV...freaking robbers. I was noticing the kids around me, screaming for their parents to get them all those disney accessories...those robbers had a field day robbing people.
1615HRS
Made my way into the stadium, had to walk up...cos I got the cheapest seat muh! Was inside, not bad the setup...the ocean must have flowed into the stadium...kids kids everywhere. I recalled having been to disney on ice ages ago when I was a kid, can't recall being all that exicited...hmmm maybe then it was probably my parents wanted to watch it more than me.
1630HRS
Light went out, announcement that the show is starting...suddenly there was this lady in green with wings on her back and a magis (konon) wand came out skating all over the arena and she was introduced as "Tinkerbell". The entire stadium erupted with kids cheering and applause...but me. I was thinking that can't be "Tinkerbell", no way that's "Tinky"...why? Well...she's FAT...yup FAT. Gosh look at her thigh man, its as big as a tree...those are the thighs of footballers not "Tinky".
Shit like what happen to disney, can't they find someone slimmer to play the role of "Tinky". C'mon, watch disney channel astro 613..."Tinky" is potrayed as the slim fairy, look at comic books...same...slim. Even the movie "Hook", Julia Roberts and not Rosie O'Donald played the role of "Tinkerbell" and she was slim ...not to forget...hot too. Aww c'mon disney, you can fool the kid but you can't fool me...thats no "Tinkerbell"...thats a fat girl in a green suit with wings prancing around.
Fat absolutely fat, I bet those little wings of hers can't lift her fat ass of the ground...and those killer thighs, they are bigger than Zidane's...and she dun look pretty at all. I want my money back!!! Somewhere along the show "Tinkerbelle" flew and the kids went wild with ...oooooooo. Kids...yo stoopid kids...can't you see they are using cables to lift her up...arrgghhh...bodoh. Parents tell your kids the truth, that the fat girl can't fly. I suppose I didn't really enjoy the show much, was waiting for it to end...finally it happened 1815HRS...finito.
Made my way hastily out to the cark-park...gosh ocean of stoopid kids with their parent. I wonder if the parents brought their kids to a sham show, was to erase the guilt of not spending time with their child. Whatever, at least my day was not all too bad...Spurs beat Chealsea and MU bites the dust again...ha ha ha ha.
I was at Bukit Jalil catching "Disney on Ice-Princess Wishes", was there at 1550HRS...an ocean of kids I saw. Made my way to the entrance got...met this dude selling pop-corn, thought to myself why not. Took a box and found out it was RM10...bummer...not worth it, should have asked for price first before buying. Then got myself a bottle of coke...double bummer RM3. This is daylight robbery man, paid RM13 for pop-corn and coke...its three times the price I pay at TGV...freaking robbers. I was noticing the kids around me, screaming for their parents to get them all those disney accessories...those robbers had a field day robbing people.
1615HRS
Made my way into the stadium, had to walk up...cos I got the cheapest seat muh! Was inside, not bad the setup...the ocean must have flowed into the stadium...kids kids everywhere. I recalled having been to disney on ice ages ago when I was a kid, can't recall being all that exicited...hmmm maybe then it was probably my parents wanted to watch it more than me.
1630HRS
Light went out, announcement that the show is starting...suddenly there was this lady in green with wings on her back and a magis (konon) wand came out skating all over the arena and she was introduced as "Tinkerbell". The entire stadium erupted with kids cheering and applause...but me. I was thinking that can't be "Tinkerbell", no way that's "Tinky"...why? Well...she's FAT...yup FAT. Gosh look at her thigh man, its as big as a tree...those are the thighs of footballers not "Tinky".
Shit like what happen to disney, can't they find someone slimmer to play the role of "Tinky". C'mon, watch disney channel astro 613..."Tinky" is potrayed as the slim fairy, look at comic books...same...slim. Even the movie "Hook", Julia Roberts and not Rosie O'Donald played the role of "Tinkerbell" and she was slim ...not to forget...hot too. Aww c'mon disney, you can fool the kid but you can't fool me...thats no "Tinkerbell"...thats a fat girl in a green suit with wings prancing around.
Fat absolutely fat, I bet those little wings of hers can't lift her fat ass of the ground...and those killer thighs, they are bigger than Zidane's...and she dun look pretty at all. I want my money back!!! Somewhere along the show "Tinkerbelle" flew and the kids went wild with ...oooooooo. Kids...yo stoopid kids...can't you see they are using cables to lift her up...arrgghhh...bodoh. Parents tell your kids the truth, that the fat girl can't fly. I suppose I didn't really enjoy the show much, was waiting for it to end...finally it happened 1815HRS...finito.
Made my way hastily out to the cark-park...gosh ocean of stoopid kids with their parent. I wonder if the parents brought their kids to a sham show, was to erase the guilt of not spending time with their child. Whatever, at least my day was not all too bad...Spurs beat Chealsea and MU bites the dust again...ha ha ha ha.
"Tinkerbell" don't fly too close to the BlackPearl, we will shoot you down with our cannons...we shit you not!!
Davy Jones is a pussy, Capt says Au Revoir.
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